Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for May 23, 2023

Why not? every other approach has failed.

Sartorial flattery

She’s thinking, “He’s cute, but, dang, he’s gay.”

Walter wears his heart on his sleeves.

But as it turns out that she’s wearing a sleeveless dress and that is in fact her skin flab …

And the background music softly repeats “Smooth Operator…”

The puffy shirt

Good morning Balladeers!

They are pretty.

Walter needs to update his romantic approach…..

Afraid you are going to need more than that Walter if you hope to get lucky.

“Take a long strut on a short runway.”

“Scram, Harper’s Bizarre!”

“Take a walk, cat.”

“No, no, Chanel.”

“Don’t make me Ralph, Lauren.”

Walter know waaaaaay too much about nomenclature of the fiddly bits of apparel.

(Why does he appear to be wearing plus sixes?)

Turn it off, Walter. That’s not Anna Wintour. :)

And it was, after a fashion……until she spied the dreaded ‘pocket protector’.

Is this at the Villages? Would be looking for a little action after a bit of pickle ball.

Walter is about as smooth as a wart hog, and just as appealing.

After an unfortunate misunderstanding with a low-talker, Walter is now desperate to get his hands on that puffy shirt.