Drabble by Kevin Fagan for December 16, 2019

Fagan, I think you’ve PUN-ished us enough! ;P

June, time to spell it out for Ralph instead of walking away.

Overheard at work, someone was doing a crossword puzzle, a coworker walked by and said “I can’t do those puzzles, crosswords make me angry”. I asked her if she meant that as a joke, explaining what it means to be cross with someone…then said, “Cross words make me angry too.”

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant

who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar

who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume

Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel.

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine

who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There’s nothing Nietzsche couldn’t teach ya

’bout the raising of the wrist,

Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed

Philosophy. . . aaargh! Honest to gawd, drives me crazy, especially Plato and anybody else who thought “reality” is just shadows of the “real” thing. . .

This reminds me of the t-shirt a friend of mine had. It had Ich weiß nicht superimposed over a German flag. People would ask her what it said, and her answer was always “I don’t know”. Drove some crazy.

Pah dum pum! (Rim shot!)

Kevin’s reserve comic when he, you know… Kant… ☺

Kant was the only book Iv’e seen get my wife so frustrated that she threw it across the room.

I Kant either.

Wrote this for a college housemate who was studying Philosophy, ca 1982: “Immanuel! Immanuel! He’s our man! If Immanuel Kant do it, no one can!”

For shame, sir, for SHAME.