Drabble by Kevin Fagan for February 09, 2020

Don’t even get started on sausage…

No plastic glove ?

Really, Ralph? You’re going with that excuse?

There was this one time on The King Of Queens when Deacon was going to say what went into hot dogs and Doug said, “Hey, man! That’s none of our concern!”

Looks like Honeybunch gets the last word (again).

I eat a lotta fruits and veggies, but they just ain’t got the staying power of a donut. . .or two. . .

For those who don’t know, just rub two fingers on the cucumbers. They have wax on them to keep them from drying out. The wax on your fingers opens those @#$%^& bags easily. You will want to really wash the cucumbers you buy, though. Other people have been fingering them. whenlifewassimpler, above, has the right idea.

Touch DNA is on everything, including donuts. At least you can scrub the fruits and veggies!

I found out the hard way that I should thoroughly wash all fruits and vegetables.

That is quite true. Never thought of that. Great! Now I’ll have to grow all my fruits and vegetables!

Well, you gotta be smarter then the bag.

Just remember there aren’t any hand washing stations out in the fields where the workers are picking and packing the produce.

Donuts are sacred, that’s why they’re shaped like halos…

You don’t need to lick you fingers, just put the bag between your palms and rub hard. You will separate the two sides easily.

You should move to New York, Plastic bags will be banned shortly, then you`I’m be able to eat your veggies

I just breathe on my fingers. No licking involved.

1) That’s why you wash them when you get home.

2) It’s very easy to open the bags, just rub your hands together with the “OPEN HERE” end between them.