Free Range by Bill Whitehead for March 17, 2011

  1. Missing large
    Edcole1961  over 13 years ago

    It could be, if it’s a really successful rain dance.

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  2. Deficon
    Coyoty Premium Member over 13 years ago

    Dancing won’t bring rivers, but he’ll flatly deny it.

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  3. 008 6
    Elaine Rosco Premium Member over 13 years ago

    Maybe a sit down pow-wow would be better.

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  4. Grimlock
    Colt9033  over 13 years ago

    I guess this pow-wow, is blow out.

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  5. What has been seen t1
    lewisbower  over 13 years ago

    Never been to a St Pat’s parade that it didn’t rain, but I really don’t remember. I hear about it after. Lord I hear about it.

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  6. U19239825
    sidl  over 13 years ago

    GREAT TOON

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  7. Sour grapes
    odeliasimone  over 13 years ago

    But my leprechaun legs won’t let me do a rain dance.!!!

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    Dry and Dusty Premium Member over 13 years ago

    COYOTY, Excellent! I wonder if anyone other than Riverdance fans will pick up on your comment?

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  9. Text if you d like to meet him
    Yukoneric  over 13 years ago

    CUTE!

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  10. Yellow pig small
    bmonk  over 13 years ago

    Recent Archeological Find

    In the County of Meath in Eastern Ireland lies the Boyne Valley, an area that has fascinated scholars and archeologists for centuries. There you find Brú na Bóinne, the Palace of Boyne. There you find Dowth, Newgrange and Knowth; Dozens of burial tunnels criss-cross the area. They were built about 3200 BC, making them older than the Pyramids or Stonehenge.

    Richard Watkins of Stanford University was part of a team that were investigating Tunnel 22 that runs north-south through Newgrange. About 122 metres down the tunnel he discovered what appeared to be an ancient cave-in. After 3 days careful work, Watkins and his team discovered that the rocks concealed the entrance to a roughly circular chamber about 4 metres in diameter.

    There were clear signs that this chamber was not a burial chamber but showed signs of being inhabited at one time. There were the remains of a fire below a gap in the ceiling that was once, presumably, a primitive chimney and source of light. There were the tattered rags that may have been bedding or clothing and some artefacts, one of which was a knife dated about the eighth century of the Christian Era.

    An examination of the chamber provided evidence that the occupant was connected with a monastery near Drogheda on the River Mattock that pre-dated Mellifont Abbey built on the same site by some 200 years. Records discovered at the abbey site indicated a Monk called MUIREADHACH was entrusted with a “pagan relic so foul it must be forever banished from the world of the living.”

    This reference led Watkins to re-examine the chamber, whereupon he found a hiding place cunningly carved into the chamber wall and hidden behind a close fitting stone. There was a solid mass about 1 metre by 1 metre by 0.5 metre behind the stone and great care had to be taken in order not to cause any further damage.

    The mass was packaged up and sent to Truro University where Professor John Dean led the team that was to analyse and preserve the find.

    It was discovered that the outer part of the mass consisted of about 5 goat skins; each had to be removed separately. Within was an ancient book. The cover was made of wood and fastened with metal clasps. The pages were fastened to the covers with cords that had only survived because of the protection of the goatskins and the atmosphere of the cavern.

    At last the team was able to see the first few pages of the book. They contained drawings, now faded, but were once rich in colour. Alongside these drawings were the spidery writings of the scribe in an ancient version of Gaelic that pre-dated the use of Roman letters.

    The search was on for someone who could translate the book. That search ended four months later in Adelaide, Australia with Bryan Tewkes. Tewkes had done extensive research on Pre-Roman Civilisations of the British Isles. It was he that finally identified the book that had filled the ancient monks with so much horror:

    Irish Dancing, Part 2: The Hand & Arm Movements

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  11. Witch
    lin4869  over 13 years ago

    And a running and jumping and dancing in place… (repeat) ZORRO, THE GAY BLADE

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