I really like how Janis has developed her relationship with Gene, Mary Lou and Meg. In the year before our mom died, I was able to help my sisters learn to see her as a person outside of being their mom. And for her to see them as individuals and not just an extension of herself as her children. That improved their relationships. There’s a process people go through when they lose their parents, where they need to figure out what a maternal or paternal means to them, and then integrate that into their lives for themselves and their children. It also helped to redefine the family so we honored each sibling family unit and person within them, rather than keeping to the roles we’d had since childhood. Everyone seems to like each other better this way.
I have lived through Arlo’s experience. When the kids come for even the briefest of stays, my wife goes nuts with cleaning, painting, gardening, and anything else you can imagine. It’s as if she’s expecting a visit from the Windsors.
The bad part is that she works me harder than Boxer in “Animal Farm.” And I suspect that I will suffer the same fate ere long.
They are interesting again. When they were very small, you were watching them discover the world around them. Now you are rewarded for not killing them when they were teens.
I envy all of you who had parents who were interested in you, or are parents interested in seeing their children grow up into interesting adults. My parents spent most of their time criticizing or making fun of us. Whatever interests we had were wrong somehow. They only cared about how many chores we did around the house. Homework? Eh. Sports? Eh. Band? Eh. “Get the kitchen cleaned up from our lunch right away when you get home from school.” Selfish people that I never wasted a tear on when they died.
As young adults become self-sufficient their lives change so much that – like us – their time is no longer their own. We visit the daughter and her children several times a year but it is hard to get schedules to work just right.
They should be thankful Gene has left the nest and can make it on his own. I have a number of friends whose kids are still at home even after graduating college.
alasko about 3 years ago
Pretty sure they’ll bring a few cases with them.
Da'Dad about 3 years ago
Janis pegged it. Seems just when they become interesting they move out.
nomad about 3 years ago
Or when they move out they become mysterious.
Cminuscomics&stories Premium Member about 3 years ago
Or, when they move back they’re broke.
Alias1600 about 3 years ago
I really like how Janis has developed her relationship with Gene, Mary Lou and Meg. In the year before our mom died, I was able to help my sisters learn to see her as a person outside of being their mom. And for her to see them as individuals and not just an extension of herself as her children. That improved their relationships. There’s a process people go through when they lose their parents, where they need to figure out what a maternal or paternal means to them, and then integrate that into their lives for themselves and their children. It also helped to redefine the family so we honored each sibling family unit and person within them, rather than keeping to the roles we’d had since childhood. Everyone seems to like each other better this way.
John Smith about 3 years ago
Arlo is so cheap that when he dies, he’ll probably walk towards the light….. and turn it off.
jarvisloop about 3 years ago
I have lived through Arlo’s experience. When the kids come for even the briefest of stays, my wife goes nuts with cleaning, painting, gardening, and anything else you can imagine. It’s as if she’s expecting a visit from the Windsors.
The bad part is that she works me harder than Boxer in “Animal Farm.” And I suspect that I will suffer the same fate ere long.
rrogersthegreat about 3 years ago
Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. Oscar Wilderichard
Tyge about 3 years ago
You better hope they don’t eat you out of house and home! 8^ )
TrudyQ Premium Member about 3 years ago
This could be a good arrangement all round.
assrdood about 3 years ago
Did I miss something? Is there an announced visit or is all this a “just in case” thing?
KEA about 3 years ago
Let’s hope the kids realize they need to talk to their parents about all sorts of things before it’s too late. (I didn’t)
mourdac Premium Member about 3 years ago
We’ll see if Janis is singing the same tune 3 years from now.
christelisbetty about 3 years ago
They are interesting again. When they were very small, you were watching them discover the world around them. Now you are rewarded for not killing them when they were teens.
MIHorn Premium Member about 3 years ago
I envy all of you who had parents who were interested in you, or are parents interested in seeing their children grow up into interesting adults. My parents spent most of their time criticizing or making fun of us. Whatever interests we had were wrong somehow. They only cared about how many chores we did around the house. Homework? Eh. Sports? Eh. Band? Eh. “Get the kitchen cleaned up from our lunch right away when you get home from school.” Selfish people that I never wasted a tear on when they died.
snowedin, now known as Missy's mom about 3 years ago
I think the kids are going to move in!
flagmichael about 3 years ago
As young adults become self-sufficient their lives change so much that – like us – their time is no longer their own. We visit the daughter and her children several times a year but it is hard to get schedules to work just right.
CynthiaLeigh about 3 years ago
Isn’t Meg in school?
locake about 3 years ago
I wonder if the “kids” even know they are expected to visit?
locake about 3 years ago
My daughters were interesting at all ages. Just unpleasant to live with for several of those ages.
Sir Isaac about 3 years ago
They should be thankful Gene has left the nest and can make it on his own. I have a number of friends whose kids are still at home even after graduating college.
bizrobinson about 3 years ago
I’m guessing they stay longer and get more relaxed than Janis is thinking.