Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for January 09, 2022

I’ve found that the length of a marriage is inversely proportional to the cost of the wedding. The more you spend the shorter the marriage.

Friend went to a wedding in the fall, $125,000, 250 guests ( $500 per guest )

How many times have you been married?…..

Badda Bing….

In 1955, mom had $500 to spend on my wedding. We were married nearly 55 years until his death.

You should have used sticky-white rice. Maybe you would have stuck together longer?

They were just commenting on his bedroom prowess.

I knew my first marriage was in trouble. At the reception—when we were going from table to table—she kept introducing me as her first husband.

How does Shoe tell the difference, and why, with the honeymoon beckoning, does he care?

How does Shoe tell the difference, and, with the honeymoon beckoning, why would he care? I guess, with Shoes disposition, all his marriages are like one-night stands.

@ Shoe: Did they take the rice out of the box?

Either Shoe is very attractive to the opposite sex or he is an easy mark for the opposite sex. The latter seems more likely

That was either a prediction or a jinx.

I am pretty sure that was a Henny Youngman joke, and if not, it should have been.

OK, you’ve all heard that you shouldn’t throw rice at a wedding because birds will eat it, the rice will swell in their stomach and kill them? That’s a MYTH – EXCEPT for “Minute Rice.” That would kill them.

That’s the problem when you insist on being married before sex.

That’s a Rodney Dangerfield joke if ever I’ve heard one. Possibly borrowed from Henny Youngman.