Real Life Adventures by Gary Wise and Lance Aldrich for January 19, 2022

She’s right about the hyphen. It works for men too. And not ALL women use a hyphen. Names like Mary Lou, Betty Jo, Mary Margaret, etc. sound like the serial killer’s moll.

Hyphening right along…

men with three names are also assassins.

My mom used three names when she was mad at me!

Yeah sure. Good luck finding a virgin among ’em…..wait….

Well, with our “open minded” society, that’ll probably change

I once finished off a box of raisin bran. I’m a cereal killer.

Is may just be my imagination, but it seems like an inordinate number of serial killers have “Wayne” or “Dwayne” as a middle name.

Sally Jesse Raphael? Olivia Newton John? Jamie Lee Curtis? Mary Tyler Moore? And wile I’m there, Sue Ann Niven?

Something I maintained for several years now: When Lee Oswald allegedly shot Kennedy, he became Lee Harvey Oswald; when they started digging in John Gacy’s crawlspace, he became John Wayne Gacy; etc. So all mentions of the whining orange loser should be to Donald John Drumpf (for the last name, look into his silly ranting about Jon Stewart not using his last name professionally; “Drumpf” was Grandpa Friedrich’s name when he left Germany to become one of the Klondike gold rush’s leading pimps).

Or being French, like Jean-Paul Sarte, Jean-Pierre Jeunet, Jean-Luc Ponty or Jean-Claude Van Damme.

OK, the last person is Belgian.

Or, a captain of the Enterprise.

Almost every one has three named. Most people just do not use their middle name in their signature.