I started doing some bear research (bear jokes, anyway) after yesterday’s RBION bit on the short faced bear, and found this.
A koala bear breaks free from the Central Park Zoo. He’s walking down the street when he encounters a hooker.
The hooker asks, “Hey, looking for a good time?”.
The koala nods in agreement and off they go to a hotel.
The two have an intimate time, and when the koala bear is done he starts to head to the door. As he reaches for the door handle, the hooker exclaims, “Hey; where do you think you’re going? You owe me money!”.
“For what!?”, the koala asks. The hooker throws a dictionary to the koala and says, “look up the definition of a hooker and you’ll find out!” So the koala bear looks it up and it says “woman who gives pleasure for money”.
The koala keeps going to the door, throws the dictionary back at the hooker, and he says to the hooker, “I’m not paying you a dime. Look up the definition of a koala bear!”.
The hooker opens the dictionary and finds koala bear. The definition reads, “Eats bush and leaves”.
The back story on Superman comicAccording to the auction house, the magazine has only changed hands twice – its original purchase at a classic US newsstand in 1939 and a sale to Mark Michaelson, who bought the comic in 1979 from its original owner and kept it in a temperature-controlled safe.
When were comic books ever sold for 10 cents? I was buying them in 1960 for 25 cents. By 1989 they were probably up to $1, not 10 cents. I think someone put the decimal in the wrong place.
Guy at the bus stop in London: “What are those?” Adam: “Brooches.” Guy at the bus stop: “Gesundheit. But what are those?” Adam: “Brooches.” Guy at the bus stop: “Gesundheit. Anyway, what are those?” Adam: “BROOCHES!” Guy at the bus stop: GESUNDHEIT! NOW TELL ME WHAT THOSE ARE PLEASE!" Adam: “BROOOOOOOOOCHESSSSSS!!” Guy at the bus stop: “Here comes the bus, gesundheit.. I’m leaving, you stay here.”
Take care, may aluminum siding installer Rodney “When I Was Born The Doctor Slapped My Mother.. I Get No Respect” Dangerford be with you, and gesundheit.
This is a coon hunting joke that I heard years ago and hope I haven’t already shared it here! The local coon hunting club was meeting on the courthouse steps and swapping stories. The new guy, Bob Tom says “You boys ain’t see nothin til you see my hound Ole Blue huntin!” “He’s always the first to tree a coon and soon as I shake that coon outa the tree, Ole Blue mounts it and makes wild crazy love to it til it keels over dead!” One of the boys says "Bob Tom you shore nuff know how tell a tale but we don’t believe a word of it! Bob Tom says "Well why don’t you boys put yer money where yer mouth is and let’s go huntin and I’ll prove it! They all agree and meet that evening at the appointed spot and release their hounds! It isn’t long before they hear that sound that they all understand. Bob Tom says “That’s Ole Blue I’d recognize his bugle mouth anywhere and he’s fer sure treed the first coon!” They follow the sound and sure enough there’s Ole Blue with a huge coon out on a limb of a big oak tree eyes shining in the moon light! Bob Tom says boys Ole Blue is about to entertain ya! Because the tree is too big to shake, Bob Tom has to climb up and out on the limb where the coon’s cowering. As Bob Tom climbs on the limb, the limb breaks, the coon jumps to another tree and Bob Tom is plummeting to mother earth screaming at the top of his lungs" FOR GOD’S SAKE SOMEBODY HOLD OLE BLUE!
Someone built a “megaprocessor”. It works like a microprocessor, except it is built with individual components, instead of integrated circuits. A lot of LEDs have been added. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z71h9XZbAWY
A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I’m always defeated.
And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers: “My dear pupil, have you defeated the Samus hoards from Metroid Dread on your Nintendo?”
“Yes, my master, I have.”
“And have you by chance searched for loot in the labyrinthine caverns of Steamworld Dig 2 on your Nintendo?”
“Yes, my master, I have searched and searched.”
“And have you studied at the Garreg Mach monastery, slain Edelgard’s Black Eagles forces, and mastered the beasts in Fire Emblem: Three Houses on your Nintendo?”
“Yes, my master, I have studied, and fought and slain.”
“That is the problem. You keep playing all this shit instead of training.”
Copy-&-Paste over 2 years ago
Believe it or Not Daylight Saving AGAIN!
Templo S.U.D. over 2 years ago
how many AA batteries does the Belgian’s jumbo Game Boy take?
Bilan over 2 years ago
Adam has been averaging about 210 brooches each Christmas.
The Superman comic doubled in value about every 3⅓ years.
fuzzbucket Premium Member over 2 years ago
I’m glad I never met Suyin.
Charlie Fogwhistle over 2 years ago
I started doing some bear research (bear jokes, anyway) after yesterday’s RBION bit on the short faced bear, and found this.
A koala bear breaks free from the Central Park Zoo. He’s walking down the street when he encounters a hooker.
The hooker asks, “Hey, looking for a good time?”.
The koala nods in agreement and off they go to a hotel.
The two have an intimate time, and when the koala bear is done he starts to head to the door. As he reaches for the door handle, the hooker exclaims, “Hey; where do you think you’re going? You owe me money!”.
“For what!?”, the koala asks. The hooker throws a dictionary to the koala and says, “look up the definition of a hooker and you’ll find out!” So the koala bear looks it up and it says “woman who gives pleasure for money”.
The koala keeps going to the door, throws the dictionary back at the hooker, and he says to the hooker, “I’m not paying you a dime. Look up the definition of a koala bear!”.
The hooker opens the dictionary and finds koala bear. The definition reads, “Eats bush and leaves”.
Until next time.
profbob over 2 years ago
The back story on Superman comicAccording to the auction house, the magazine has only changed hands twice – its original purchase at a classic US newsstand in 1939 and a sale to Mark Michaelson, who bought the comic in 1979 from its original owner and kept it in a temperature-controlled safe.
James Wolfenstein over 2 years ago
Gold watches are too expensive…
Caldonia over 2 years ago
If you still need to wear glasses to play such a huge Tetris game, you must really have poor eyesight.
Caldonia over 2 years ago
Two cannibals were dining on a flat earther. “This is the nuttiest meat pie you’ve ever made,” said the husband.
preacherman Premium Member over 2 years ago
When were comic books ever sold for 10 cents? I was buying them in 1960 for 25 cents. By 1989 they were probably up to $1, not 10 cents. I think someone put the decimal in the wrong place.
lmuller7 over 2 years ago
F – - – -’s Everything all up for a while . LEAVE IT ALONE !
dv1093 over 2 years ago
I’d like to meet the fool who bought that comic book. I’ll bet I could sell him some air.
Huckleberry Hiroshima over 2 years ago
Guy at the bus stop in London: “What are those?” Adam: “Brooches.” Guy at the bus stop: “Gesundheit. But what are those?” Adam: “Brooches.” Guy at the bus stop: “Gesundheit. Anyway, what are those?” Adam: “BROOCHES!” Guy at the bus stop: GESUNDHEIT! NOW TELL ME WHAT THOSE ARE PLEASE!" Adam: “BROOOOOOOOOCHESSSSSS!!” Guy at the bus stop: “Here comes the bus, gesundheit.. I’m leaving, you stay here.”
Take care, may aluminum siding installer Rodney “When I Was Born The Doctor Slapped My Mother.. I Get No Respect” Dangerford be with you, and gesundheit.
markhughw over 2 years ago
Because Suyin the Collections Manager was a loan shark? Kind of a backhanded complement.
joefearsnothing over 2 years ago
Jogger2 over 2 years ago
Someone built a “megaprocessor”. It works like a microprocessor, except it is built with individual components, instead of integrated circuits. A lot of LEDs have been added. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z71h9XZbAWY
JoshHere over 2 years ago
You shouldn’t be Suyn Tings, just people
FassEddie over 2 years ago
A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I’m always defeated.
And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers: “My dear pupil, have you defeated the Samus hoards from Metroid Dread on your Nintendo?”
“Yes, my master, I have.”
“And have you by chance searched for loot in the labyrinthine caverns of Steamworld Dig 2 on your Nintendo?”
“Yes, my master, I have searched and searched.”
“And have you studied at the Garreg Mach monastery, slain Edelgard’s Black Eagles forces, and mastered the beasts in Fire Emblem: Three Houses on your Nintendo?”
“Yes, my master, I have studied, and fought and slain.”
“That is the problem. You keep playing all this shit instead of training.”
paranormal over 2 years ago
Is a brooch a broach? Kind of like bonnet is a hood and boot is the trunk of a car???
Teto85 Premium Member over 2 years ago
The Superhero. Still looking good at 83. Looking Super, in fact.
Caeruleancentaur over 2 years ago
$2.6 million for one comic book and children still go to bed hungry.
ekke over 2 years ago
Sadly, that 2022 $2.6 M is the same actual value as the 1939 10¢.
mikecurley over 2 years ago
Forever!