Daddy's Home by Tony Rubino and Gary Markstein for April 29, 2022

Something tells me the car doesn’t have a compass (analog or digital) on the dashboard.

Nobody taught her that the sun rises in the east and sets in the west. Once you know that, finding south is easy.

I have a compass on my rear view mirror if I didn’t have it I would get lost before I went 10 feet. I’m one of those people who has no idea which way is north south east or west.

He just made a cardinal point sin.

All my back seat drivers point and say go right or left. Since they are behind me I need to decide which hand is which. Lately that requires a lot of brain power and usually When the turn is made, it was the wrong direction anyway.

Yea for us oldsters..

My group is planning a road trip soon, I’m sure it will be hysterical.

This Australian language is fascinating: “Guguyimidjir, has no words for left and right. Instead, speakers give all their descriptions and directions based roughly on the fixed four cardinal points of the compass: north, south, east and west. So the light switch might be to your west as you enter the room, the television to your east.” https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/80947/5-essential-types-words-some-languages-do-without

Mrs gives directions by exit numbers. I have no idea of the numbers, I travel by street names. For instance she will tell me take Exit 1C…..uhhh what is 1C? If she told me “Mill Plain” I have no problem.

Like me, she must be a California girl. Believe it or not, I have to drive South to get to the beach.. Left and right is so much easier.

Left or right is either left or right but south or north or east or west? I would have to think about it first and miss the turn.

That is why I have a compass in my car. I am directionally challenged and without that compass, I would get lost a lot more often.

Usually, I plan the route beforehand and remember it (most times).

Then there’s my (now aged) navigation system and even older maps. In case of a detour, I just follow my gut and ignore the system’s constant bleating to turn around until it finally agrees to calculate a new route…

Yes, we do have smartphones, too – but in some rural areas there’s no reception at all.

And there’s always the backup-option to ask a local for directions – unless the landmarks are only useful for locals…

Port or Starboard?

Really want to tick her off?

Gee or Haw!

But saying ‘right’ or ‘left’ is direct. The other way is like having to do mental math, then turning.

Yep, that’s Her. Her first Garmin was the best $450 I ever spent!

Looks like Tony’s slacking again so I’ll have improvise the QOTD: Did things go south?

Yeah, in a hurry.

Neither left or right, south is down.

Of course, Magellan never made it back home.

As the great Erma Bombeck once wrote: " I don’t speak east/west".

That’s why I drive and the wife rides. I do left and right and north south east west.

NEWS is best as a general guide if you’re familiar with the lay of the land. (Not necessarily in my current home base, where the Main Street runs NE) BTW, times are i wish my car’s GPS had a part of the display like an aircraft heading.