FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for February 25, 2023

Audits are a PITA

Get a dog and say “The dog ate my homework”

Or, “Jason’s pet iguana Quincey ate my homework.”

I was learning programming using the old punch cards. If you had any smarts you would number them!! If dropped you could get them back in order. One unlucky person dropped theirs in a puddle.

World War I the first “War to End All Wars.”

I never did homework, and look at me now.

I remember those agonizing nights of desperate self-destructive procrastination oh so well. Here I am decades later desperately procrastinating going outside.

Wait! Peter takes notes?!?

har-har, Peter

I was noted for having poorly organized notes. One night, I finished my math homework as the last task before preparing for bed. I put the homework into a loose-leaf binder. But, the binder was overloaded: It suddenly snapped open, papers slid onto the floor, and some seemed like they jumped into the air. Picking them up, they seemed to be mostly unordered. I was too tired to sort them.

The next day, at school, the math teacher checked our homework. When he got to me, I said “My notebook is out of order.” I was referring to the malfunction. But, the teacher laughed, because he liked a pun.

I was an office assistant for one period in 7th grade, a pretty young lady and I were given the task of sorting locker cards. They were in just one huge pile so first we had to separate the three grades then start alphabetizing them. I took us most of the semester but we had almost finished and then some students broke into the office and tore everything up including our three perfectly sorted locker cards. It was heartbreaking

Noted…

kicker very funny, giant chuckle…

Peter, in your case the first part of the trick would be to con Mom into believing that you were actually so diligent and attentive in class as to take that many notes. Good luck with that!