Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 05, 2023

Is one of those teams the Washington Senators?

sad…but true! How else can do many politicians retire as millionaires?

Not entirely accurate. The gray team is the one that got the Ump his job in the first place – and helps him keep it.

In politics, it’s called freedom of speech.

Citizens United v. FEC

The court held 5-4 that the free speech clause of the First Amendment prohibits the government from restricting independent expenditures for political campaigns by corporations, including nonprofit corporations, labor unions, and other associations.

It was announced this week that Senator Schumer gets twice as much money from Blackrock than any other senator. And Representative Pelosi’s net worth has gone fron $7mm to $44mm.

This is the standard to which some of our highest officials hold themselves, or would like to have that privilege. The Supremes are obvious, but so are many medical doctors and politicians or would-be pols. The superrich. It amounts to a claim of “I always know what’s the best way to proceed and am above the influence of worldly concerns.” And if you’ll believe that, you’ll believe anything.

Good one Pastis. You just nailed how a majority of those in government are wired and operate!

So works the European and Italian Parliament.

Sing it Pig!

Very astute, Pastis.

(News item, the Globe and Mail: “Federal Budget Pledges $675 Million in CBC Funding.”)

Today’s brain teaser:

 Which of these is capable of speech?

(A) concrete

(B) corn

© cows

(D) corporations

(E) none of the above

The sixth panel should be from an anonymous PAC, and the bribe should be at least ten times larger, but with a clear introduction as coming from a “generous friend” of the manager who provided the first “little” bribe.

To quote an early SNL character, “Baseball been very very good to me”.

The old adage is true, “Money talks, B.S. walks”!

Also explains the mainstream media system.

It’s not a bribe, it’s lobying.

From various sources, it seems that the top 25 or so richest members of congress is pretty evenly split between Ds and Rs. One example: https://www.businessinsider.com/wealthiest-members-congress-house-senate-finances-2021-12#1-sen-rick-scott-a-republican-from-florida-200327223-2

must have ref’ed the Kent State game………

Heard this idea a long time ago. Politicians should wear the logos of their owners on their suits such as different oil, car, and drug companies so that people knew who was really in charge.

Politicians are the cause of our sorrow.

The ever clever Mr Pastis is clearly alluding to the NFL playoffs last year and Pig bet on Kansas City.

Definition of an honest politician. He stays bought.

Good job by Pastis of tackling a real political problem in a non-partisan way.

Sunglasses on, now add an ice cream cone…

Keep saying that, Pig.

It’s called playing ball.

It’s not a bribe as long as you promise to be fair. Everyone knows that.

The humans have no mouths. I just noticed that.

U.S.A.

The best politicians & Supreme Court that money can buy.

The root of all evil

This is 100% ACCURATE on BOTH sides of the aisle!

Ah, Pig, Pig, Pig. You poor, gullible, porker that you are!

“I will be open to the considered views of my colleagues on the bench, and I will decide every case based on the record, according to the rule of law, without fear or favor, to the best of my ability, and I will remember that it’s my job to call balls and strikes, and not to pitch or bat.”

- John Roberts, Chief Justice of the US Supreme Court at his September 12, 2005 Senate confirmation hearing.

i am not amused

But but but … They are Democrats so, by definition, they are doing what’s best for everyone.

If someone buys you and you don’t deliver, no more money.

And thus my proposed Constitutional Amendment:

“A person shall be defined as an individual human being; the rights of a person shall accrue to no other entity than an individual human being.

Money is not speech.

Each citizen shall be taxed annually in the amount of $1 to fund election campaigns, and no funds from sources other than this fund may be spent in any way to influence elections."

No. The umps gets money from both teams, and more from the blue team than the red, overall, although usually not for the same ump.

California passed a finance reform law that went into effect, this year. Now, lobbyist groups are demanding the RIGHT tp pay-for-play!

https://enewspaper.sgvtribune.com/infinity/article_popover_share.aspx?guid=02c88554-3911-4313-bf33-ffc96a14a5e8&fbclid=IwAR2ZUzhl7sw4bKZmBmDi-KjIK3Ku6I-sEU58B1WUoon4M4s2YT6Cc0rMoNw

Sigh.

The price for fairness has gone up.

Lobbyists – salesmen with almost limitless expense accounts with no real product. Just sway pols whichever way is in their best interest. Lobbying should be illegal.

I rather enjoy the symbolism of the ump and the guy bribing him are both wearing sunglasses…

Unfortunately he is correct. BTW GeorgeInAZ as long as I know who is giving the money I can factor that into who I vote for. It is things like Karl Rove’s 20 anonymous donors for 25 million dollars that scares me.

NFL officials!

Pelosi’s money all came from recycling her pop bottles. Just ask her.

Yes, even Biden.

I’m voting for my father. It’s only been 25 years since he passed and he’s still the most honorable man I ever knew.

Paying an expert for his unique analytic technique and judgement is truely the American League way…

Not what Rat is saying, Pig

Pig still believes in the tooth fairy and pixies.

Rat nailed it.

There’s a solution to all this. I can sum it up in two words, “TERM LIMITS.”

Supreme Court

There was an old joke about Louisiana politicians during the Reconstruction. “He was known as an honest man because when he was bought, he stayed bought.”

This demonstrates why Pig should not be allowed to vote. The rest of us are cynical enough by now to try at least to make the “least bad” choices. Groan. Maybe this is why some philosophers of old preferred monarchy as a system of government….

Ahem, wouldn’t an umpire represent, the judicial branch ?

ARREST HIM. HE COMMITED BRIBERY OF A PUBLIC AUTHORITY/OFFICIAL. NO WHAT ARE YOU DOING STOP IT! OMG 2 THOUSAND DOLLARS. AREN’T YOU TRAINED AGAINST BRIBERY!!!! Actually, Bribery is an invisible tax on the residents of the country.