Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for March 24, 2023

“But you’d better not, because having a knife would get you sent to Valley Modified!”

That’s not how you hold a trumpet.

Sign man returns! And what a clever sign!

Gil vs. Ming the Merciless.

“Will “Apache Basketball” have any role in the championship? Or were the last three days yet another completely irrelevant character introduction? Milford vs. Valley Tech… coming up!"

Who the f___ is Lachlan McLean. I just Googled and discovered only an Australian soccer player and a news anchor in Kentucky. Is that where Milford is? Will Milford win with a last second sky hook, designed by Kareem?

I’m no English major, nor anything close to being one, but is there a reason why the singular championship game is bed called ‘championships’?

Lachlan McLean (no relation) is a sportscaster in Louisville: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lachlan_McLean

This is presumably the Valley Conference championship game, not the state “playdowns” (which Milford has seen only once in the last 15 years!), but this game will probably the last basketball we see this year, so the author seems to be conflating the conference and the state playoffs. (And as far as “tension” goes, the Gil vs. Martinez angle is already played out, mostly because the antagonist just isn’t very interesting.)

Lachlen McLean? What the what? You mean Marv Albert or Joe Buck weren’t available for broadcasting The Valley championship game?

P2- Not an accurate portrayal of Lach. However, he has had interesting sports talk shows and I have met his wife when she was in the local media, nice lady.

P3- Square jaw and steely gaze heavenward, The Gilfather has that look that 2nd place is all his.

P 3 (Gil thought bubble): “… holy s***!… is that Beth?…”

The brass section musicians look a lot like the Captain piece in a game of Stratego.

Jefferson Jeffs Gym Jam! Jumpin’ Jillikers!

Why is an Australian soccer player at a Milford basketball game?

P 2.5 (Lachlan to Marty): “…Moon…when I hold my fist up….that means ‘shut up’ …you only talk when I say so…this is my broadcast…”

P 3 (Luke thought bubble): “…Thorp farted and I bet he did it on purpose…”

Why is it being played at the jeffs gym ? plus wheres the chinese coach ?

There is something wrong with that trumpet. Is it in two pieces? Gil looks really determined for this game. On the other hand, what is he looking at? Is he distracted already? Did his pilot friend just walk in the gym? And speaking of distracted, I hope you’re not distracted from reading today’s Mopped Up Thorp.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/

Coach Hairy isn’t even the head coach. I forgot Did Hairy’s son quit the team???

Luke Jr will hit the game winner with a skyhook.

Meanwhile(an old Berrill standby phrase)

On the Glenwood Cruise Across The Galaxy tourline

Fred and Wilma are, brace yourself, HOLDING HANDS TODAY!!!!!!! No word from our sources whether Fred went farther than Gil and Mimi on their own honeymoon and/or whether the chastity belt was in due time removed. We’ll have more information as this story develops. Back to you, Chet.

In the hallway of the cruise ship

“Hey, Fred, how’s things under the sheets?”

“M-OK, Gil.”

The bands there, and so’s Mike Knappe.

P-1: The Pep Band plays the Politically Correct “Sweet Georgia Ecru”.

P-2: The Non-Legendary Marty Moon drops and important article “A”, causing Pre-game consternation.

P-3: Gil scans the stands for the elusive letter, while Luke tries to think of a way to blame the Milford Coach for the outrage.