Herb and Jamaal by Stephen Bentley for July 11, 2023

Herb, you’re dadgum if you do and dadgum if you don’t.

He who hesitates is lost!

I’d follow up with: “Why? What got you thinking about it?” Stall, man, STALL!!!

With a perfect hour glass figure? No way.

Yes! Stick with the one you’re on, because it has done a great job!

“Uh, we should all cut down on processed foods.”

My wife talks about dieting, then has a snack of peanut butter and honey before bed.

The only answer would be “why” but don’t hesitate giving it.

“Why? Aren’t you feeling well?” One does not “Go on a diet” one changes ones diet for health reasons.

Just use the old standby, “You look as beautiful as the day we met!”

Best answer: “Of course not, dear; why meddle with perfection?”

2nd best: “No, dear.”

3rd best: “If you think you need to, dear.”

I won’t even waste time on the plethora of really stupid answers he could give that would land him on the couch for a month.

On another note, every time I see this kind of humor, I’m thankful for a wife who has never, in 38 years of marriage, tortured me with foolish questions like that.