Aunty Acid by Ged Backland for July 26, 2023

Guess which one she is.

i had only the first one and it was just about enough in the place of the other three

I AM THE ONE.

There is one who is always complaining.

I’m the one who’s always sarcastic.

And of course the boss always cracking a bull whip; according to my dad.

According to my boss, I’m the first one. But she doesn’t know that I just do it to annoy her.

Small offices have to settle for a combo-person.

Make them 5: the one who does all the work which the others don’t do.

how about the one who takes endless smoke breaks :(

Some workplaces have totally different types.

One who can’t lift more than ten pounds.

One who has handwriting worse than the doctors. (me!)

One who is afraid of the telemetry.

One who can’t hit the broadside of a vein with a 20 g needle.

The one who is always backstabbing…

The one talking….chronic complainer!

I sit there quietly and smile. It drives everyone else crazy wondering what I am plotting.

And then there’s the one who actually gets the job done

Well Aunty they got a threefer when they hired you then. Nothing like having a late to work, sarcastic motormouth. So tell us who’s the singer.

Well I am the one singing when I am not the one talking.

Guilty on all four counts.

Johnny Rivers sang: ♪♫ “I’m the one, oh I’m the one. I’m the one, I’m the one. The one they call the seventh son.” ♫♪

Make that 6. The one like Aunty who sits around doing nothing while judging the others.

I wonder which one Aunty is???

True.

And if you’re self-employed it’s all on you

And there’s always a “Sob Sister” – “A girl or woman who is prone to overly emotional pleas, complaints, or outbursts”, who’s always soliciting attention and sympathy. I was unfortunate enough to once work in a place that had two of these competing with each other for the role, and very willing to beset the unwary with tales of their latest disaster.

I’ve always said, every workplace should hire at least one lazy person, they’re the ones that find the easiest way to do things.

Downsizing, sorry, ‘right’ sizing, has necessitated those remaining become multi-taskers.

Add two:

The idiot who absolutely has to listen to their radio with small, tinny, squawking speakers.

The idiot with the cell phone who is constantly yelling to the person on the other end, or who leaves their cell phone lying around with it ringing nonstop (and the obnoxious ringtone) and the friends/relatives who, when the idiot doesn’t answer, just hang up and call again and again until they do.

… also the one stealing from the company.

my wife’s been lucky up to now to have a couple jobs where she replaced #9 the perpetual screwup. anything she did was going to be an improvement and she was constantly being told, “wow, you do that so much better than ______-san did…”

one of her current co-workers is the one who’s constantly jawing and is also typical of workers in general, straining her brain more about how to avoid work than actually just getting on with doing the work. fortunately, the rest of her crew are #11 the ones who look for ways to make each other’s work easier…

Let’s not forget the one who chews gum all day long with his/her mouth open.

And sometimes all those characteristics describe 1 employee!!