The Born Loser by Art and Chip Sansom for July 29, 2024

Sounds more like you’ve got osteoarthritis to me.

I broke my right femur twice, the first time in 2000 the second in 2004. May I be considered a Born Loser ad honorem?

Or your neck.

If only Brutus would be as lucky.

Don’t read my horror scope. I’d rather be surprised.

Joe Theismann’s horoscope for November 18, 1985. Stay away from Lawrence Taylor, Brutus.

Veeblefester would be happy if Brutus would break a sweat at work.

“If it weren’t for bad luck I’d have no luck at all!” Apologies to Hee Haw and Mr. Sansom.

Gym time is in order, Brutus.

hey, she said a big break… she didn’t say anything about it being lucky. :}

break time!

Brutus is going to get a KitKat bar?

Know thyself. Good thinking Brutus…..

Feeling pessimistic, Brutus?

Horoscopes are like the old Sibylline books were, worded so practically any meaning can be attached. Maxentius followed the Sibylline books and interpreted the Chi-rho symbol in the sky as a victory for him. The trouble is Constantine saw the skyward sign, too, and came up with the same conclusion. That battle didn’t go well for Max and Constantine took Rome. So, our Brutus could be right that a coming break could mean a broken bone and not a promotion. Smart.

When there’s a light at the end of the tunnel for Brutus, it’s an oncoming train

Look at he silver lining Brutus – you could get off work for awhile!

Better the Femur than your HEART. Take care Brutus. We love you.

That was the break I was thinking of, just wasn’t that specific. I mean, that’s the kinda breaks born losers get.

Oy! Sounds like Brutus has the same black cloud hanging over him as I do. I could be sitting in my own house, minding my own business, and trouble knocks on my door!

Nothing worse than a broken ring tailed femur.

Break me off a piece of that Kit Kat Bar!

Brutus lost his eternal optimism for a minute there.

Purple top and shoes!

It’s ridiculous and nonsensical to pay any attention to a horoscope.

Or your bank account, courtesy of Gladys. Whichever.