Nick and Zuzu by Nick Galifianakis for August 14, 2024

And hear about it for decades.

That’s what my grandmother did, and it ruined her life. Of course, I wouldn’t be here if she had listened to her parents and relatives and the rest of the village.

I did that and worse in my early 20’s. Don’t regret it either, it was effective.

The quickest way to unite groups of people is to give them a common enemy.

“Couldn’t I just get an indelible scorpion tattoo?”

Oh, [colloquial word for copulation] ’em.

Alternate response: “Oh, right. I could date you."

Nick, I really like the way you catch the gesture in your subjects.

I keep rereading that advice. And it sounds better each time. Just be ready to dump both family and date in that order.