Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for October 24, 2024

and next⠄⠄⠄he’ll ‘fertilize’ your lawn

Bow… Wow!

wrappers add fiber to his diet

Authentic? He’s eating with his front legs.

He a waredoggie eh.

Ain’t nobody goes as Ninja Sloth except for Ninja Sloth.

You dog, you.

Next time unwrap them first!

he’s really a dog, dressed up as a boy, dressed up like a dog

He’s no bark and all bite.

Those screams will be epic.

Has a raccoon come in through the cat door once years ago and ate almost half of the post Halloween candy…it left the wrappers. We, now, feed them and the opossums a daily dish of dry dog food, so that they’ll stay outside.

That’s where all the vitamins are.

My first dog got into my purse, pulled out a roll of Ricola cough drops, unwrapped them, and ate them. I found the wrappers on the floor (along with some Sudafed, which fortunately she’d just licked the coating off — it took a minute to realize what the little white things were).

I learned to never leave my purse on the floor, or anywhere she could get into it!

I also had a different dog who ate an entire bag of Halloween candies, including the wrappers. When I realized my child had hidden them in her closet and left the door open, I checked out the dog. She was “fat” and her sides and belly were too warm. That was a long night at the vet. It was also my birthday, which comes before Halloween, and my child had bought the bag as a present.