Here’s a version with even more doubles-entendre……………
ARTIST: Cole Porter
TITLE: Brush Up Your Shakespeare
[Kiss Me Kate]
The girls today in society go for classical poetry
So to win their hearts one must quote with ease
Aeschylus and Euripides
One must know Homer, and believe me, Beau
Sophocles, also Sappho-ho
Unless you know Shelley and Keats and Pope
Dainty Debbies will call you a dope
But the poet of them all
Who will start ‘em simply ravin’
Is the poet people call
The Bard of Stratford on Avon
{Refrain}
Brush up your Shakespeare
Start quoting him now
Brush up your Shakespeare
And the women you will wow
Just declaim a few lines from Othella
And they’ll think you’re a hell of a fella
If your blonde won’t respond when you flatter ‘er
Tell her what Tony told Cleopatterer
If she fights when her clothes you are mussing
What are clothes? Much ado about nussing
Brush up your Shakespeare
And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
With the wife of the British ambessida
Try a crack out of Troilus and Cressida
If she says she won’t buy it or tike it
Make her tike it, what’s more As You Like It
If she says your behavior is heinous
Kick her right in the Coriolanus
Brush up your Shakespeare
And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
If you can’t be a ham and do Hamlet
They will not give a bleeep or a damlet
Just recite an occasional sonnet
And your lap’ll have honey upon it
When your baby is pleading for pleasure
Let her sample your Measure for Measure
Brush up your Shakespeare
And they’ll all kow-tow - Forsooth
And they’ll all kow-tow - I’ faith
And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
Better mention “The Merchant Of Venice”
When her sweet pound o’ flesh you would menace
If her virtue, at first, she defends—well
Just remind her that “All’s Well That Ends Well”
And if still she won’t give you a bonus
You know what Venus got from Adonis
Brush up your Shakespeare
And they’ll all kow-tow - Thinkst thou?
And they’ll all kow-tow - Odds bodkins
And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
If your goil is a Washington Heights dream
Treat the kid to “A Midsummer Night’s Dream”
If she then wants an all-by-herself night
Let her rest ev’ry ‘leventh or “Twelfth Night”
If because of your heat she gets huffy
Simply play on and “Lay on, Macduffy!”
Brush up your Shakespeare
And they’ll all kow-tow - Forsooth
And they’ll all kow-tow - Thinkst thou?
And they’ll all kow-tow - We trou’
And they’ll all kow-tow
This is the life of Teena Keene – almost 11 years old, a fifth grader and a good student. She’s an avid inline skater and not quite ready to give up her dolls….that about sums it up….
gimmickgenius over 13 years ago
kfaatz925 said, (yesterday)
“@gimmickgenius - I’m impressed! Is that an original, or something I should already know about?”
OOOPS - sorry I didn’t attribute it; from KISS ME KATE, lyrics by Cole Porter.
hawgowar over 13 years ago
Slap Jeri and go on having fun, Tina.
kfaatz925 over 13 years ago
@gimmickgenius - thanks for the info, and the laugh!
gimmickgenius over 13 years ago
Here’s a version with even more doubles-entendre……………
ARTIST: Cole Porter TITLE: Brush Up Your Shakespeare
[Kiss Me Kate]
The girls today in society go for classical poetry So to win their hearts one must quote with ease Aeschylus and Euripides One must know Homer, and believe me, Beau Sophocles, also Sappho-ho Unless you know Shelley and Keats and Pope Dainty Debbies will call you a dope
But the poet of them all Who will start ‘em simply ravin’ Is the poet people call The Bard of Stratford on Avon
{Refrain} Brush up your Shakespeare Start quoting him now Brush up your Shakespeare And the women you will wow
Just declaim a few lines from Othella And they’ll think you’re a hell of a fella If your blonde won’t respond when you flatter ‘er Tell her what Tony told Cleopatterer
If she fights when her clothes you are mussing What are clothes? Much ado about nussing Brush up your Shakespeare And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
With the wife of the British ambessida Try a crack out of Troilus and Cressida If she says she won’t buy it or tike it Make her tike it, what’s more As You Like It
If she says your behavior is heinous Kick her right in the Coriolanus Brush up your Shakespeare And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
If you can’t be a ham and do Hamlet They will not give a bleeep or a damlet Just recite an occasional sonnet And your lap’ll have honey upon it
When your baby is pleading for pleasure Let her sample your Measure for Measure Brush up your Shakespeare And they’ll all kow-tow - Forsooth And they’ll all kow-tow - I’ faith And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
Better mention “The Merchant Of Venice” When her sweet pound o’ flesh you would menace If her virtue, at first, she defends—well Just remind her that “All’s Well That Ends Well”
And if still she won’t give you a bonus You know what Venus got from Adonis Brush up your Shakespeare And they’ll all kow-tow - Thinkst thou? And they’ll all kow-tow - Odds bodkins And they’ll all kow-tow
{Refrain}
If your goil is a Washington Heights dream Treat the kid to “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” If she then wants an all-by-herself night Let her rest ev’ry ‘leventh or “Twelfth Night”
If because of your heat she gets huffy Simply play on and “Lay on, Macduffy!” Brush up your Shakespeare And they’ll all kow-tow - Forsooth And they’ll all kow-tow - Thinkst thou? And they’ll all kow-tow - We trou’ And they’ll all kow-tow
jppjr over 13 years ago
This is the life of Teena Keene – almost 11 years old, a fifth grader and a good student. She’s an avid inline skater and not quite ready to give up her dolls….that about sums it up….