Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for May 27, 2011

Some people can get pretty ugly whenthey’re depressed Rodney.

I’ll take a dozen of these and 4 of those over there. Do they come with a warantee if they don’t work?

Remember few years ago when foam bricks were the big thing for you to throw at the TV? Some folks messed up and threw real bricks and then went out on the front porch and played ‘Dueling Banjos’.

But how do I charge the batteries??

Back when I was knee high to a grasshopper, we didn’t buy no pre made bricks. No sirree, we pried the cobblestones out of the street to throw at the rich man’s carriages. Had to be careful not to hit the horses or you’d have hordes with knives and saws. Did I ever tell you about the time———————?

Reminds me of “The Life of Brian”

The invention of the rock star.

He needs to add pitchforks and torches. Those are very popular in Madison, Wisconsin.

If they’re so easy to use, why do I have to wade through the French, Spanish, German, Chinese, Japanese and Yiddish instructions to find the English directions???

Have the rocks been approved by the EPA and/or the FDA?

His night job is clearing the rocks from the Fink’s podium and then selling them again tomorrow.