Doonesbury by Garry Trudeau for July 01, 2012
Transcript:
Dean: Here he comes... I've got to be firm! In short, Mr. Harris, we feel it's time for you to move on. You've been at Walden long enough! Zipper: It might seem so, Dean Campbell... yet I would argue, as Thomas Jefferson did, that education shouldn't have arbitrary parameters... Mr. Jefferson believed colleges shouldn't even grant degrees, that students should just stay until they felt educated! Dean: I see. And when do you anticipate feeling educated? Zipper: One more year should do it. Dean: One more year? Zipper: Tops. Yo, it worked! Who's Thomas Jefferson? Student: The dude on the nickel.
BE THIS GUY over 12 years ago
Thanks Google.
Linguist over 12 years ago
LeoAutodidact over 12 years ago
And WHO is PAY-ing for the additional Year?
palos over 12 years ago
You’re welcome to stay as long as the tuition checks clear the bank.
Snimssu over 12 years ago
Leo : I think Zonker is Walden’s one and only student with a scholarship
jnik23260 over 12 years ago
Why should Walden care, as long as Zipper’s rich parents are paying them to keep him there.The Harrises must be part of the 1% if they can afford to waste money like that.
Cofyjunky over 12 years ago
Rich parents or not, it’s one thing for an older man to go back to school to enhance his career-prospects, or to earn a promotion at a company….it’s quite another to be an older man still living in a dorm full of 18-22 y/o’s, making him the creepy, lazy, older guy who’s sticking around to ogle the freshman girls…who later call campus-security on his creepiness. Man up and leave, Zipper!
Buzza Wuzza over 12 years ago
Think of the potential jokes to be made from Zipper’s insanely huge student loan!
brick10 over 12 years ago
Zipper is a legacy, Uncle Zonker Harris (Lord …???) is supporting him at Walden.
Mitchtheone over 12 years ago
The scary part is that Zipper could one day be Dean by default….
Charley007 over 12 years ago
As long as were getting all Walden-y, where is the damn puddle!? Please say global warming hasn’t vaporized it!
wcorvi over 12 years ago
Sophomore was the best five years of my life!
EighthAt14 over 12 years ago
At least he knew enough to take his hat off in the dean’s office.
JeNagVaz over 12 years ago
Well, our “wonderful” governor just reinstated the real-estate developer business woman, who tried to fire President Sullivan, as the rector of the board of visitors of MR. JEFFERSON’S school. Business trumps learning… TJ must be spinning, considering that creating UVA was, what he felt to be, hist most important legacy.
YatInExile over 12 years ago
I guess Zipper’s auditing of commencement didn’t go well.
And how many years did Zonker get?
RonaldDavis over 12 years ago
If I had waited until I felt educated, I would still be in university, and I am well past retirement age (though not retired). Eventually, I had to give back for my education, both financially and morally.
LiviaBay over 12 years ago
LOL!Yep the oldest “Big Man on Campus” title
Hunter7 over 12 years ago
one more year to relax, watch the clouds drift by, audit a class or two, take in a few round table discussions down by the pond. sounds good.
tigre1 over 12 years ago
Time spent in school…very close to Heaven, I think. And even today, ’way older than you, for instance…girls buy me stuff.
What’s YOUR problem?
William Bednar Premium Member over 12 years ago
Zonker has a scholarship? Wouldn’t that imply that he can’t leave Walden until he feels he’s a scholar. That could take far longer than a year!
Spyderred over 12 years ago
Very funny – but I find it difficult to believe that any college or university would rid themselves of a student as long as there was money for fees and tuition to be obtained.
Ellen Gwynne over 12 years ago
Reminds me of a classmate who thought Venezuela was part of the Middle East because they both had oil!
SHIVA over 12 years ago
What does this moron do to pay for his tuition???
fritzoid Premium Member over 12 years ago
“fritzoid Do you know how heavy a dollar coin is? True they last longer but is it really worth it? I don’t think so.”
Oh, of course I do. I use ‘em. They’re great for parking meters and vending machines. And a dollar coin is certainly lighter than four quarters, and how many quarters might you have in your pocket at any given time? But like I said there’s no need to ever carry more than four dollar coins at a time, if you don’t want to.
It’s true that the current design isn’t ideal, and it would make little sense to come up with a new one while there are tons of old ones sitting in the vaults, but it isn’t the only option. The Australian dollar coin is smaller than a U.S. quarter, but a bit thicker. The $2 coin is both smaller and thicker still. If I remember correctly, the £1 and £2 coins follow the same pattern.
We’ve got several Canadians who bop around this site, so I’ll put the question to them: If you were offered the choice, would you go back to having $1 bills?
Yontrop over 12 years ago
The Euro comes in one and two coin denominations too. The smallest bill is five. I don’t have a problems with that. In fact I thought we should do away with the dollar bill in 1976. You see I remember when a quarter was worth about three of today’s dollars. A two dollar coin makes sense. Anyway, if carrying a few coins is too much for you, maybe you should work out a little.
Yontrop over 12 years ago
Oh, and in the 1950’s the government tried to introduce a new coin worth one tenth of a penny. No one wanted to be bothered with them — too much trouble. So now that a penny is worth a lot less than a tenth of what it was then, why do people want to be bothered by pennies. If you want to lighten your coin load, get rid of pennies, they are not worth the time it takes to count them.
Mythreesons over 12 years ago
I have very few coins to carry. Use a debit card for small purchases and credit card for larger ones. Do need some paper bills on hand for tips.
tcambeul over 12 years ago
One more reason to remove tenure from drones…er professors!!!
Kirk Sinclair over 12 years ago
You wish. Tuition has been increasing ever since Reagan (look it up) – to the point where going to college is outrageously expensive for the young. .Education is a hindrance to the far right’s agenda – people thinking for themselves are a threat. See the 2012 Texas GOP’s platform (look it up) – it literally is against teaching “higher level thinking” otherwise known as critical thinking skills – something I’ve often seen lacking among right wingers. The Texas GOP made it official policy.
Astolat over 12 years ago
US$1 is worth about 65p in sterling at present, mid-way between the 50p and £1 coins. We’ve had the former since 1969 and the latter since 1984. Yes, get too many £1 and £2 coins in your pocket and it’s a bit heavy, but why would you -as Fritzoid says, you only need four. I wouldn’t want to always be going for both a wallet and the change in my piocket for small items; I’d forever hand over notes and get even more shrapnel in exchange.
However, we do have a long history of a £1 coin, the sovereign, which probably helps. They are also nice objects, particularly the bi-metal £2 coin (gold outer ring, silver inner circle) which I think the French came up with first.
Beleck3 over 12 years ago
Pricing the “serfs” out of education is the Republican way, at least since St. Ronnie. and the results prove how easy a dumb sheeple will follow the “leader”. Stalin, Lenin would give their “eyeteeth” for such a docile/zombie population.
only in America, under the Republican Trickle Down/idiot Society. Consume as the PR marketeers decide. What a brilliant way to con the scared white folks. been working for over 40 years now. got to give it to the Elites/Republicans, they know what they are doing.
that stupid American, lol
the rest of us just have to go John Galt on these “kind.”
omgomg over 12 years ago
I guess this would make Zipper the “COLLEGE WIDOW”. college widow???? see the Marx Bros film “Horse Feathers”