Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 16, 2012

Ha! Dinky can be used as a war missile

Must be a VSTOL: first vee stall, und zen vee crash.

You may want to re-think that, G. D.

I don’t know which is more funny, LGDs plan or Dinky’s expression. It’s a tossup

Well, at least it’s cost-effective. You save on the expensive rocket missiles, and you save on food expenses.

“Hovering high overhead” what? An army of ants?

Until he goes splat.

Man, before I read this strip I thought Guard Duck mistook Dinky for a grenade. That was actually funnier. But this is still pretty good.

Pvt. Dinky has a name! Congratulations, private! —Sort of.How many missions do you figure he’s good for, LGD?

When you throw him, you’re supposed to yell “Duck!”Truth in advertising, or something.

I suppose in most armies dinkies would naturally be privates.

fire in the hole!

Be all you can be, Dinky. Not some sitting duck.

DUCK!

Love Guard Duck and loved the “toss” sound effect, to make sure we know what was happening. Very funny.

Punting instead of tossing would get you more hang time.

YAAAAA haaaa haaaa haaaa hooooey!

LGD needs to sign up Randy Johnson as his “Mobile Recon Launcher”.

I want to fly but not like that.

If it’s against the Geneva Conventions to bomb livestock, it’s probably also illegal to bomb with livestock.

Guard duck is messed up.

Well, if nothing else, Dinky is quite aerodynamic.

Whoooooooosh!

LOL xxx

Dinky still flies better than him.

feathers were ever thus

Poop on the enemy, you think?

PULL!

You’ve almost got the right idea, LGD; what you should do is attach a rubber band to Dinky’s leg. That way you can toss him in the direction of whatever you want observed, then bring him back quickly.

Ba, hilarious!!

And from now on I will read all of LGD’s lines in Sarge from Red vs Blue’s voice.

Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!Use him as a bullet!

I’ve always liked that kid. He has potential.

I would consider him My son, sir.

“Here’s a man with a very interesting cat. This is Tiddles, is it not?” “Ah, yes, this is Tiddles.” “And what does she do?” “She flies across the stage and lands in a bucket of water.” “By herself?” “Ah, no, I fling her.” “Oh…how interesting.”

Hey Guard Duck, maybe you could have a partnership with Peter Sripol.