Doonesbury by Garry Trudeau for August 28, 2019

What is the membership fee?

So, your Diety is Jane Fonda, Emeril and Bill W?

It went viral, probably

It’s all about the repeat customer.

Your ideas intrigue me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

And in a few years it will be a Mega Church.

Yoga and Bingo, isn’t that Twister?

Jesus could have used a focus group like that.

You can’t have your own denomination until you find that one teeny tiny tinsy bit of doctrine that you can twist into a new shape and make your own by ultraparsing some obscure snippet of verse from the Bible. For the most enjoyable example I can think of, see the sermon from Beyond the Fringe on the text of “for mine brother Esau is a hairy man and I am a smooth man.” I would join any cult that made me laugh that hard!

How does religion spread? Simple answer – gullibility!

Always an angle

Would people grok ‘Thou are God’?

I suppose the school big wigs did not miss the tax exemption stuff either.

Now throw in prosperity theology and you will soon have a mansion and a private jet.

I’m not religious or anything like that but The Rev was always one of my favorite characters.

Organized religion is evil and must be eradicated.

Infancy stage of a cult?

Anyone here remember Flip Wilson’s “Church of the What’s Happening Now” with the “Reverend Leroy”?

Amen to that!

James 3:12

How (normal) religion spreads, a 6 step process:

1. Start in a time of political and cultural upheaval, when the established structures of society begin to decay and break apart.

2. Proclaim some divinely inspired message, one that basically says the current consensus is bogus, and that we should all try a different, purer path that is more accessible to the everyday man and woman. Emphasize how your movement focuses on community welfare and personal accountability, in comparison with older organized faiths that have grown corrupt and institutionalized.

3. Aggressively seek out new converts amongst all walks of life, starting with the poor and neglected, but slowly making your way up to the rich and influential, using your natural speaking abilities and presence. Choose apostles who are of like mind and skill, unshakeable conviction, and who are personally loyal to you and your vision. Make a point of flouting norms and conventions, but avoid getting involved in any serious, divisive political disputes, at least early on. Remember for the time being that you are as much revolutionary as prophet.

4. Watch as your organization grows exponentially. Be prepared to spend virtually all your funds on evangelization and public works; most religious leaders are frauds, but the most naked and short-lived frauds are those who spend their followers’ hard earned donations lavishly on themselves. Adopt an ascetic lifestyle that you would have your followers emulate. Rely on volunteers whenever you can to get your message out. Do not rely on paid messengers.

5. Once your faith has grown enough that you’ve attained the notice of those in power, begin courting them. Make the case that their legitimacy is reinforced by association with your new and exciting religion, which is growing by leaps and bounds. Bless them and sing their praises as they reward you with tax exemptions, land donations, and other privileges and liberties befitting holy persons such as yourself.

Marketing 101: find needs and fill them

Religion, yes, Christianity, not so much.

Soup Kitchens led to Cooking lessons.

And, the Local Emergency Clinic was very grateful when the cooking lessons started to kick in.

At least in the U.S.A.

I’d say Unitarian if not for the cross and clerical collar.