Frazz by Jef Mallett for August 29, 2013
August 28, 2013
August 30, 2013
Transcript:
Boy: I'm warming up to the idea of having back-to-school sales early in the summer as they do. Frazz: Well, you don't have to spend your precious last week of summer buying clothes. Boy: Exactly! You get to spend it breaking them in! Frazz: Does your mom know you're climbing trees in those?
When I was about ten, I was over at a church parking lot. It was paved with dirty sand from the engine factories in town…Oily…I don’t know why I went over there, because I already had my new pants on to go out to dinner……But a fight occurred, and I won, until I got home. My pants were ruined…Black oily smudges on new pants, never to be gotten out….My mom was madder than I’d ever seen her. Scared the hell out of me. “Wait until your father gets home!”, she said. For three hours I sat in my room in dread of what my dad would do….When he got home he asked me how it had happened….I told him the truth, a smaller friend of mine was being beat up (A guy my dad knew was always picked on) and I defended him…BTW, I almost lost, he was much bigger than I, but I have a mean streak, so as a last resort, I hit the ass in the balls and grabbed a cancerous handful of toxic oily sand and shoved it in his eyes and rubbed it in…. I don’t go down easily….When my dad heard the part that I did it to protect my friend from a bully, everything was forgiven by Dad’s decree….I had done what was right….BTW, the dude probably died of eye cancer….