Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for April 14, 2022

Bitsy hates it when people refer to themselves in the third person.

Laser surgery? Lacrosse? First or third baseman foot position?

Okay guys here’s my solution , after every pitch I call time,look at the catcher ,get the sign and with my Scooter Super Speed run to the mound and tell you what pitch was signaled . What da ya think ? In all reality , we think it sucks but Thorp might like it .

Wow….she knows how to use Google… look out, Heather

But she probably doesn’t. I’ve heard of catchers using bright nail polish but not tape on their throwing hand. I didn’t even need Google to figure that out too

P2.5 So what Gregggg? That’s your problem and no one really gives a sh*t.

Baseball rules allow wearing glasses if he doesn’t want to wear contacts. You’re even allowed sunglasses (but not the mirrored ones) from Little League through the Pros. What am I missing?

We will see if my far fetched notion from yesterday comes true with Scooter getting the pitch signal and relays iit to Greggg. This might be the little guys value to the team.

Does Scooter work for Ford?

It’s a good thing the Valley allows teams to use a DH, or Greggg would be knocked unconscious in his first batting attempt. “It’s almost as if he never saw it coming!”

Check out those glasses. He IS pretty young for bifocals.

This is Milford, so contact lenses aren’t available yet

So on the few occasions the coaches do show up, you can rest. Pitchers have been known to not pitch every day, you know.

Just throw your 105 mph fastball on every pitch.

P2: “HEY! Who turned out the lights?”

Hello, colorist. You’re not coloring Grandpa Walton’s hair. It’s not grey!!

Is Scooter’s fist above his head supposed to represent a lightbulb?

Sorry Scooter, semaphore flags won’t work.

Lasik!

Give me an effing break. Unless The Scooter’s idea involves talking to Coach Thorp (bwahhahah, I crack me up!) and a medical intervention, I’m ready to boycott this lame story arc and concentrate on Charis the Chameleon and her ever changing tennis togs.

If his vision is that bad, how is he even able to hit the catchers mitt? And missing the batter?

I hope no one hits a line drive right back at his melon!

Scooter reads the catcher and yells to Greg, fastball, change-up or curve. Gil will never catch on.

So, is this scene supposed to be a couple of years or more in the future from yesterday? Glasses kid looks even older and “Scooter” looks heavier and shaggier than they did yesterday.

Only Gil would make a kid who can’t see for s*** a starting catcher. ..Gil: “…hey!….that runner just stole second and you didn’t even try and throw him out!….” Catcher: “…huh?…what runner?…”

Yeah, tape on the catcher’s fingers or nail polish would “tip everyone off,” though it is used all the time in the bigs. Maybe Scooter can bring a garbage can out to second base and bang on it—that would work!

Who wrote this dialogue? Mopman?

I’m sorry, but are we supposed to believe that his vision is so horrible, even with glasses, that he can’t make out fingers from 60 feet? (Or whatever the exact distance is.) And NOBODY knows? Despite the fact that he, I assume, can’t get a driver’s license? Can’t even read the board in class unless he’s in the front row and squints? He probably has some special school accommodations? And NOBODY knows? And speaking of knowing, you want to know that today’s Mopped Up Thorp is online.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/