Customer: “I have a big problem. You cut off my head!”
Me: “I’m sorry? How did I cut off your head?”
(The customer shows me an obviously self-taken picture, with the top of his head removed.)
Me: “Sir, it looks like it was taken that way.”
Customer: “No, it wasn’t! My whole head was there when I took it. I’m sure!”
Me: “Okay, let me see your memory card…”
(The customer hands it to me, and I go in the lab and pull it up on the computer. Sure enough, he chopped his own head off in the picture.)
Me: “Sir, that is the whole image, and the top of your head isn’t in it.”
Customer: “But it’s DIGITAL! Can’t you fix it?”
Me: “You can’t create something from nothing.”
Customer: “But… but… but… I need a photo for a dating website!”
Me: “Give me the camera and go stand over there.”
Customer: excited “Hot d***! You can be my best man!”
Me: “A thank you card will be enough.”
(Skip ahead nine months…)
Female customer: “Is your name [My Name]?”
Me: “Yes, can I help you?”
Female customer: “My husband wanted you to have this.” hands me an envelope
(I opened the envelope, and sure enough, there was a thank you card with a picture of him and his wife. He actually got married and sent her in with the card!)
A Heady Proposition NOT MY STORY
Customer: “I have a big problem. You cut off my head!”
Me: “I’m sorry? How did I cut off your head?”
(The customer shows me an obviously self-taken picture, with the top of his head removed.)
Me: “Sir, it looks like it was taken that way.”
Customer: “No, it wasn’t! My whole head was there when I took it. I’m sure!”
Me: “Okay, let me see your memory card…”
(The customer hands it to me, and I go in the lab and pull it up on the computer. Sure enough, he chopped his own head off in the picture.)
Me: “Sir, that is the whole image, and the top of your head isn’t in it.”
Customer: “But it’s DIGITAL! Can’t you fix it?”
Me: “You can’t create something from nothing.”
Customer: “But… but… but… I need a photo for a dating website!”
Me: “Give me the camera and go stand over there.”
Customer: excited “Hot d***! You can be my best man!”
Me: “A thank you card will be enough.”
(Skip ahead nine months…)
Female customer: “Is your name [My Name]?”
Me: “Yes, can I help you?”
Female customer: “My husband wanted you to have this.” hands me an envelope
(I opened the envelope, and sure enough, there was a thank you card with a picture of him and his wife. He actually got married and sent her in with the card!)