Matt Bors for August 04, 2008

Transcript:

American Soldier: Our Gitmo detainees are CHAMPS at holding their breath. Chinese Soldier: Our Falun Gong prisoners have OLYMPIC endurance for torture. American Soldier: Our domestic spying is UNBEATABLE. Chinese Soldier: HA HA! Surely you jest! You are but an apprentice, young Jedi spy. American Soldier: Oh yeah? Well, our incarceration rate is a WORLD RECORD, Commie! Chinese Soldier: Yes, but we lead the pack in EXECUTIONS, capitalist pig! American Soldier: Maybe we could SHARE the gold medal for state oppression? Chinese Soldier: You keep it. You need something valuable that isn't backed by my country.