Matt Bors for April 27, 2009

Transcript:

The president is unsure about prosecuting any common criminals. Barack Obama: Yes, this grungy perv invaded womens' privacy. But let's not focus on "retribution." GRUNT! Justice officials won't be investigating blatant crimes anymore. Police Officer: It could upset your neighborhood association if we proceed on this. Woman: SO? And admitted TORTURERS are being invited to spout their bizarre legal theories during prime time. Torturer: I was just following orders - the ones Galix 6 beams in through my min-wheats. Man: Well, I admire your good intent. PAT PAT Finally...Equality Under the Law!