Moderately Confused by Jeff Stahler for December 03, 2024

Just throw them out and buy new lights.

I’ve been using the perfect solution to this. Seven years ago I decorated my little fake tree (which I rescued from a second hand shop for £1.50). Every year I carry it, still decorated, to and from my attic. I might add candy etc but it in the next few weeks it’ll be out in my living room again.

I have extension cord organizers that I wrap the lights around, easy peasy.

Mine is a 4-footer, placed in the basement fully decorated, with a sheet covering it. Soon, I shall carry it upstairs and plug it in … maybe move some decorations around.

Putting on lights and decorations has been a family ritual since we married. First in city with bought trees. Then in rural area we had trees cut on the property. One year we picked a nice fir, put it in the stand and went to bed. Next morning ceiling was covered with thousands of tiny new mantises. Seems the room heat opened their pods. Was fun chasing them down. Moved to town, and last 28 years we prefer a fake pine we bought for apartment living then brought to current home. Has foldout branches that hold light strings and the decorations we started with all those years ago. So the work isn’t work. It is a trove of memories of a love affair that began 63 years ago.

Tree is pre-lighted, all I have to do is lug it in from the garage and assemble it. Mrs takes care of the rest. Outdoor lights? Don’t get me started. I told Mrs last Sunday this will be the last year I hang lights on the house. I will pay for LEDS that stay up all year sometime next summer.

Ain’t that the truth………..

We have an unlit phony tree. Had it for decades. We have 140 running feet of lights that have never ever tangled be they the outdoors one or indoors. I take them off each year with more than enough time to fold them each and zip tie each one. It all fits in the ‘light’ box for storage. Sometimes being an*l is a gift.

this is what happens when one de-decorates at the end of the season and just stuffs the lights in the box thinking… “I’ll worry about the mess next year.”

She would have to channel the Incredible Hulk if she lives in California.

Jeff, I also loved your editorial toon today about the aliens looking for a leader…

Or, you could take a piece of cardboard and wrap the lights around it when you take them off the tree – you know, like a sane person.

I have a solution for that, but it’s more fun watching you get frustrated.

Wad them in a tighter ball, mount on top of the tree as a colorful twinkling star. Wel, an orb at least.

Charlie Brown tree here, plug it in, done!