Monty by Jim Meddick for July 27, 2014
Transcript:
No! No! No! Noooooooo! Oh, Lord! No! No! No! What the...?! It's 3:30 a.m.! What're you doing?!! I thought I told you not to go online!... But it... It started looking purple around the periphery!! I told you not to search online for symptoms! You always end up finding websites devoted to bizarre horrible medical conditions and then work yourself into a hypochondriacal panic! It's just a hangnail! Now give me th' laptop and go to sleep!! Ok... You're right... You're right... Oh... And EB... Yes? If it does happen to turn out to be Panamanian finger parasites, and my fingers fall off in the night, do you promise to dial 911 for me? I promise.
Sisyphos over 10 years ago
A friend in need is a friend who wants you to dial for him when his fingers fall off. —Or to give him a cup of hot chocolate and some soothing “there, there” words when he awakens from his hypochondriacal nightmare!
billyruffian over 10 years ago
Pretty sure I had those once, too – I used apple cider vinegar
puddlesplatt over 10 years ago
don’t let that happen, I need the hand…both!
ChessPirate over 10 years ago
Panamanian Parasites Prompting Purple Periphery? Phew!
Hunter7 over 10 years ago
As your friend, I will always dial 911 for you. And hand you a clean towel so you may cover your boo-boo. .But that’s it. Anything else – have the doc take care of it.
nitromicro over 10 years ago
A Saturn brand laptop?
Strod over 10 years ago
I’m with EB on this one. On several occasions I have consulted WebMD about some minor symptom I am having at the time. One of the possible diagnosis is always cancer. Ugh.