Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for November 09, 2013

‘Let the bodies hit the floor’; or in this case street… sing it everybody… an a one… an a two…

Looks like the ideal congressional retirement plan.

The fireman is there to wash the bones and innards into the drain. The ambulance is just for the grounds staff that get hit by bouncing change and loose keys. The plan works better if the middle managers push the top management and board members out the window until the company is back within budget.

Corporate officers first.

First my eye was drawn to the target and the chap with a broom, and, for a second or 2, I thought this was some strange curling game.

Wait!!! Light yourself on fire first!

And don’t yell Geronimo, that’s insensitive….

Glad you chose the ’before" sequence on this one, Mr. Miller….I appreciate it….

Step 1: make insurance mandatory. Step 2: take the premiums and run. Step 3: single payer.

I laughed. It’s not funny: It’s true.

I know that big events get corporate sponsorship, but I think Target might be taking this a bit too far.

since when does a comic strip call for someone to kill themselves?? just struck me as very distasteful in a section of the paper meant to be cheery.

Ya know, Mr. CEO, you’d save the same amount by firing just one of the 220 middle and upper managers you hired as you would by firing 20 of the front line staff. You’ve noticed the front line staff? The ones who are seen by the customers, and who are the face of the company? They’re also the ones who receive the complaints about prices that rose because wage costs went up just before you anounced mass layoffs due to low profits.

An anomaly, Supreme Court, thanks to ‘conservatives’,declares that cooperations are persons. So when one of their minions quits, the lucky person is given a going away party. Too bad that public services has to clean up the mess.

“Yes, death to all corporate execs. And with them go the jobs they provide.”If a company is begging for a bail-out, there are many things you can call their execs, but “job providers” isn’t one of them.

Mythbusters tested the lead balloon; now they need to test the golden parachute.

Now THIS is a “corporate bailout” I’m all for!

How about a Golden Shower….

The target and brooms look right but it couldn’t be curling. They use a Zamboni instead of fire hose and I never saw a St. John’s Ambulance inside a bonspiel. (There are places where the previous statement actually makes a certain amount of sense.)

and a prize for the biggest SPLAT!!!!

It is funny to wish death on people.

They’re gonna need more brooms

If corporations are people, that means they have the right to vote in all elections, right?….But why bother? Just buy a whole bunch of votes wholesale……Much more efficient…..

I’d be right out front if it was the “select group” that received waivers on O-Care chanting JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!

Sorry, but this would be far too merciful for my tastes. I want to see the Bank$ters perp-walked down Wall $treet (and none of this coats-over-handcuffs garbage! I want to see humiliation ALL around!) to the nearest Police precinct, be forced to go through all of the booking rigamarole that us commoners have to go through, tossed into a regular holding cell with all of the regular off-the-street riff-raff (hookers, addicts, rapists, thieves, etc.) — and do it on a late Friday afternoon so that they have to wait until Monday for arraignment and (denial of) bail! Meanwhile the Feds and cops can get search warrants and ransack all of their houses and properties for evidence — multiple times! (Don’t be neat, officers! Make it a game! Have a bit of fun!) And that would be just for starters…

“Remember: the corporation exists because people buy their product. Just convince people to stop buying.”

No, Companies exist to make/sell products, Corporations exist to run a Ponzie scheme using the companies as bait. Just convince people to stop investing!

I’ll agree that corporations are people when one of them gets sent to Afghanistan to serve our country, and when another one of them is tried and executed in Texas.