Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for February 08, 2022

You’re going to die of old age waiting

Ask a stranger at the bar to sign for you and then forget his name. Is Microsoft going to analyze surveillance footage to figure out who he is?

Won’tpower is stronger than willpower.

I can win a stare-down with a cat any time but even I won’t take on a computer screen.

Spouse is convinced that computers like me best. Because I don’t (usually) get frustrated with their absurdities, but just keep trying to find a way. That’s not so different from engaging in a death stare — in an opposite sort of way.

You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here…..

You can win a stare-down with a laptop. But all that happens is that it dies, it won’t concede.

And people wonder why there are so many jokes about lawyers

But, as I learned from a comment I read a few days ago, there are actually only 3 lawyer jokes. The rest are true.

Seems only reasonable, really.

You do that. And don’t forget to send a bill for your legal, umm, services to your laptop.

Ah, but this world is not run by our world’s laws, even the laws of physics.

Waiting for a response from the digital biggies is like waiting for an ice cycle to start melting at 20° F.

Why all the lawyer stalling? Are these chargeable hours? I’m thinking his mouse battery ran out and he can’t figure out how to click on accept for the agreement.

Have you told the laptop you’re a lawyer? Maybe it thinks you’re sitting there doing nothing because you’re an idiot… Not clear of the difference at this point. (With apologies to my wife, who is a lawyer. Of course she always tells me to hit ‘agree’: the terms are actually illegal and wouldn’t hold up in court anyway when they demand our firstborn child.)

Not sure if I’m going to hang around for this.

Do people really bring their laptops to bars? Beer and computers seems like a bad mix.

Hey, that’s not Flo. Why are they not at their Mom’s bar?

As Trump has shown, a good lawyer is all you need to be a successful criminal.

Hey what happened to their mom? I thought she ran the bar?

Yogi Berra would always send the first salary contract back unopened.

He reasoned “Whatever it is,it’s not enough”.

Gravestone in Goldfield,Nevada—-

UNKNOWN MAN.

Died eating library paste—July 14,1908.

Nowadays he must be negotiating the free speech clause

The contract is nonnegotiable, take it or leave it.

Is the resemblance to Nixon intentional?

Unclear on the concept.

A double back slapper of a toon, Wily.

Lawyer vs. IT Tech. Tech wins EVERY time.

And on a laptop you can make the fine print very fine.

Danae’s uncle, right?

Who’s the bartender?

The legal will, but the lawyers won’t.

That is a standard form. Can it legally be negotiated? I would find that interesting.

There’s a fix for that. You just say NO! in a language the computer understands. On second thought, that’s not quite correct. You say NO! in places where the computer will understand it.

Fabulous portraiture in panel 3.