Ordinary Bill by William Wilson for April 13, 2012

  1. Pa130680
    Yakety Sax  over 5 years ago

    A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island.

    One day, the three of them are walking along the beach and discover a magic lamp.They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie.

    The genie says, “Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one.”

    The brunette says, “I’ve been stuck here for years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home.” POOF! The brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family.

    Then, the red head says, “I’ve been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too.” POOF! The redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family.The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie asks, “My dear, what’s the matter?” The blonde whimpers, “I wish my friends were still here.”

    A guy walks into a tavern. As he walked up to the bar he noticed a twelve-inch man playing the piano, so he asked the bartender, “What’s that all about?”

    The bartender told him he that would tell him later. So the guy asked the bartender for a drink. The bartender said, “Before you get your drink, you get to rub the magic beer bottle and make one wish.”"

    “Okay,” said the guy. He went over to the magic beer bottle and rubbed it. Poof. Out came a genie. The genie, of course, said, “You have one wish.”

    The guy thought about it and then wished for a million bucks. A cloud of smoke filled the room, and then both the genie and the guy disappeared. In a few minutes, the guy reappeared back in the bar with a million ducks all around him.

    The guy was astounded and said to the bartender, “Hey! I didn’t want a million ducks.”

    The bartender replied, “Do you think I wanted a twelve-inch Pianist?”

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  2. Screenshot 2023 09 06 10.29.47 am
    The Seagull  about 1 year ago

    This is exactly what Rhode Island locals are like

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