Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 25, 2006

Transcript:

"Hello?" "Hi, mom. It's me, Wren." "Wren? My newborn baby? Since when do you talk?" "I've always been able to talk, but Kirkman and Scott don't want to show it 'cuz I'm the last kid they're gonna add to the strip and if I grow up too fast, they're out of a @#*#@#* job... Capiche, Wanda?" "That's "mom" and since when do you curse?" "Chill, homey... Listen... The babysitter got wasted, Zoe and Hammie blew up a gas station and the kid from 'Zits' is dead... Do you mind if I use the down feathers from your pillow to stuff a dead animal?" "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." "You freak out at the slightest @#*#."