Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 11, 2015
May 10, 2015
May 12, 2015
Transcript:
Goat: What are you doing, Rat?... I'm trying to talk on the phone. Rat: I am Jerk Czar, the self-appointed anointer of jerks. Goat; So why are you bothering me? Rat: Because you're using your cell phone in a restaurant and nobody wants to hear your phone calls. Goat: Yeah, well, it's important, so- Rat: I anoint rather hard.
Bet better than half the folks talking on a phone in a restaurant or movie theater are taking an “important call” if asked. And better than three quarters of these “important calls” are merely gossip calls. Which means than less than a quarter are actually important.
I’ll still never forget being in a restaurant and having some woman on the phone all the way across the restaurant. Not some little ma and pa hole in the wall type restaurant, but a nice large place and they were like twenty to thirty feet away. Everyone in the place knew where they were going to go for vacation, about the unfairness of their daughters speeding ticket, what happened when they took their dog to the vet, their dad passing a stone, etc. But you really couldn’t hear the folks at your own table for them talking on the phone.