Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 30, 2018

The people in Pilates disagree with you, Jeff.

Put Rat in his place, Jef!

Okay, Jef, who are the second most important people in the world after cyclists? Wait, don’t tell me! It’s the bicycle assembly and maintenance people!

Sparks, NV, stardate…… well, this morning. Busy intersection at “the mall”. Watched as two of the privileged class pushed the button to cross, then rode their bikes through the pedestrian crossing. You either is a walker, or you ain’t… can’t have it both ways, even though you think you should.

Jef is a loser.

If you think you’re the most important person in the world, try telling a cat to bring your slippers.

Enter Victor the Vegan…

People love to have resentment against somebody.

Actually Goat, you’d do better to let Jef handle it, and then sit back and enjoy the show!

That’s just how I think of the posters here at Go Comics…commoners. I’m the one at the top of the food chain. The rest of you are just bottom feeders!

What does Jef look like in regular street clothes? Oh, I forgot that is his street clothes.

What if Rat takes up cycling?

Jef the cyclist is my least favorite character in the strip

Jef is to God what Rat is to humble.

Stephan, I just gotta ask, how many encounters with bicyclists do you have? Your intense hatred of them suggests they plague your every waking minute. We just don’t have that big a bike problem in these parts, I guess.

If Stephan isn’t bashing himself – he is bashing his friend and fellow artist – Jef Mallett.

it as 70 in Philadelphia’s suburbs last night and i almost went for a bike ride. i decided to give the car-people another couple days. because not all cyclists are dicks

Well, they certainly act like the most important people in the room. I nearly got run over by one last night when I clearly had the walk sign in my favor.

I’m beginning to suspect that Jef has started bulking up on anabolic steroids.

So, can I put on my jersey, my Spandex shorts, my sunglasses, and my helmet, and act like a jerk too?

Cyclists are rude.

OK, Some of them are.

xxx

Jef, you’re not the best spokes-man for your kind, and we tire of your self-promotion. You’ve almost completely derailleured my respect for bicyclists, so saddle up and pedal your short spandex of attention outta here!

Vehicle with the largest tires has the “right of way”!

The world would be a better place if you didn’t speak at all, Jef the Cyclist….

Self-importance is not important!

No I’m the most important person me LarryEverybody luv larry

No, no, no. We all know the vegans are the ones who think they should get canonized as saints.