Reality Check by Dave Whamond for May 07, 2021

Nope sorry you’re on your own.

Do those even exist anymore?

“Let me check. I think I’ve got one of those in here.”

Finicky.

Do I look like a Starbucks barista?

I doubt there ever was such a thing.

Good luck staying hungry, bird.

Beggars can’t be choosers…but I may have a few…..Ralph may want some too! LOL

He forgot organic and free range.

“Would ya settle for this old pizza crust?” “Otherwise I’m gonna feed the ducks.”

Yes. Is that what you want to be breaded in?

This is what can happen when you don’t follow …

… the “Don’t Feed the Animals” signs.

and while you are at it can you add a grande doppio extra lungo mega hyper espresso with soy milk, no sugar, heated at 300 degrees two pumps macchiato .. or something?

Yes, but it isn’t ethically sourced, so I threw it away.

Beggars can’t be choosers, bucko

“No. I do have a hankering for foie gras.”

Have a piece of bagel.

This sorely tests my “Don’t kick birds” rule.

I used to eat that for lunch. It’s called “Pizza”!

Now we know what sent Tom Leher over the edge.

Thank God you can buy gluten-free breadcrumbs now. You feel so silly making your own. :)

My main requirement for anything I eat, is that it tastes good, not whether or not it has—or doesn’t have—whatever is trendy at the moment. I would only check on all that other stuff if I had a particular medical issue that would require me to make sure something didn’t have ingredients that would be harmful to me.

Hang a left at the next bench down. Expensive there however so prepare a song and dance.

That food is called styrofoam…

Ducky want a quacker …?

Yep, this is pure unadulterated GMO!

I say we stuff him!

“No, but I’m havin’ squab fer dinner t’nite”

No one is going to comment on how weird the tree looks with it eyes and eyebrows?