Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for July 24, 2017
Transcript:
fall colors preview it's almost time for mother nature to do her fall foliage magic! here's a handy map with a preview of what we can expect- capon bridge hagerstown thurmont frederick baltimore annapolis leesburg front royal washington warrenton shenandoah natl. park culpepper la plata fredericksburg key to map orange leaves, how original! an o.k. color for fast food restaurant decor, but does it even belong outside? what is this, gamboge? put a color like this on a tree & that tree will look fat. a teal would work well here. but no, we get yellow. how tediously aggressive red is! besides, doesn't it rile up the cows or something? camouflage! does anyone even do camouflage anymore? this sort of plummy, glutinous burgundy just screams "martha stewart manque!" or is mother nature being a teensy bit ironic? no. do i have to say it? "ecru" is french for "drab." i mean, please, who does your foliage, sherwin-williams?
It would be easier to follow the map if it were in color rather than grey-scale.
They never promised you a rose garden. Or a green one; or blue….