Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for July 20, 2018

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ask mr. questionable dear mr. questionable, what is pollen anyway? i really hate it. -really hates pollen dear h.p., pollen, also known as tree dander, flower soot & shrub schmutz, is that little floaty stuff that gets up your nose & makes you miserable and turns your car yellow. when dino-saurs roamed the earth sometime ago pollen often got as large as decorative throw cushions! yikes! hope this helps! dear mr. questionable, my child, age 51/2, always smells like styrofoam. why? -arlington mom dear a.m., she could be artificial. have you checked? read my book "coping with relatives who smell fakey." dear mr. questionable, is "cankersaur" a funny name for a dinosaur? -wondering in d.c. dear wondering, and how! style local woman forty ointment dear carolyn, my fiance hates my new boyfriend. they fight constantly! what should i do? -on the wrong page dear o.w.p., i'd laugh real hard. see my new book "coping with the misfortunes of others through laughter." rraghargangarng dear mr. questionable, i got my cat fixed and now when i put it in neutral it makes a funny noise, like "rrangharghangarngh." what's wrong? -cat owner dear c.o., it's dietary or the idle's set too low, is the cat foreign or domesticated?