Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for March 12, 2020
Transcript:
what's the right band instrument for you? guy: ow the sousaphone try handling this thing in a stiff breeze without incurring a major mal-occlusion. it's a regular orthodontist's delight. avoid this one. the viola the most ill-tempered member of the notor-ious string family. currently under indictment for ar-ranging a hit on the woodwind family. viola: tonight the bassoon sleeps with the fishes. cello: right, boss. the glockenspiel about as musical as a baby's toy. you might as well just jingle the loose change in your pants pocket. dinky dinky dink dinkadink dink dink dinkydi dinky dink kid: stop.
That viola has quite the attitude if he wants to be in a band (usually only wind and percussion instruments).