Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for August 11, 2021
August 10, 2021
August 16, 2021
Transcript:
August is the boring season in DC. Everybody takes off for the beach or the mountains, leaving the town vacant except for a few busloads of heart stricken tourists and matching orange outfits and well, you & me. And I frankly enjoy it! For those who also savor the tedium, here's a list of the most boring places in the DC area. It's limited to small places only, nothing like, say, the Springfield interchange or the less oxygenated reaches of the Federal Triangle. A window ledge with a rubber plant in a green foil covered pot, ancient magazines & that flies in a Lee Highway drycleaner. A Permit Parking Only occupied by a rusty card from a long defunct grocery store and a gravelly lot in Hyattsville. A half obliterated historical marker on 6th St. identifying site as the former center of DC's once thriving hat blocking district. A small neutral zone of beige in Metro car #314 that can be comfortably stared at since it's not somebody's armpit, Fanny pack or, worse, face. Jean Weingarten will return & things will perk up.
As a young lad in suburban Oklahoma, I often dreamed of growing up and becoming a professional hat-blocker.