Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal by Zach Weinersmith for August 25, 2022

Physicist: “Here, hold this glowing metal rod, and step back one parsec. I want to try something.”

I had a scientific father. All he ever said was, “Don’t touch that, and don’t let anyone else touch it.” Never explained why, either. Just replied, “Because I said so.”

Biologist: Well you certainly didn’t get those “stupid genes” from my family.

Chemist: Have you been using any “funny chemicals”?

Immunologist: Just because everybody acts that way doesn’t mean you have to.

Paleontologist: I may have old ways of thinking, but I’m no old fossil.

Mathematician: No dinner until you can recite the derivatives of all six trig functions! And if anyone says I’m not a scientist, they’re right, but beat them up anyway.

What’s the point of even having children if you don’t use them in your experiments?

Better than having religious parents: Believe these impossible things or you will burn in hell for etenrity!

Hmm… One of my high school friends was the son of a ballistics engineer. A friend from college was the son of a proctologist. Yes , they were weird. Almost all of my friends have been weird though

I prefer my engineers a-workin’ on the railroad all the live-long day, thank you very much.

You could probably make people in all kinds of careers look like bad parents, just by removing all semblance of compassion.

Archaeologist: I’ve got a bone to pick with you…