Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for August 13, 2019

Ask him his age, and see if he says “Aye matey”.

Maybe he should try "YYAAAAARRR!!

Doc, don’t argue with a man wearing a hook!

Peg leg, hook nad and lost an eye. He should have gotten a check up a long time ago.

He better go see an optometrist instead of a general practitioner.

Ye’d think a pirate’s favorite letter would be ‘Arrrr,’ but his true love be the sea.

Open wide so I can see your epiglottis!

If he said “rrra” he’d be diagnosed with dyslexia.

I understand the leg and the hook, but how did you lose the eye? “First day with the hook.”

Never trust a doctor with his hand in his pocket.

But, but… it’s Talk Like a Pirate day!

The ten letters of the pirate alphabet: R, I I, and the seven Cs!

A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea.The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook, and an eye patch. The seaman asks,how did you end up with the peg-leg?" The pirate replies, "We were in a storm at sea, andI was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a sharkbit my leg off." “Wow!” said the seaman. “What about your hook”? “Well”, replied the pirate,“We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of theenemy cut my hand off." “Incredible!” remarked the seaman. “How did you get the eye patch”?“A seagull Pooped into my eye,” replied the pirate. How could You loose your eye to a seagulldropping?,the sailor asked. “Well,” said the pirate, “it was my first day with my hook”

“Aye Me Bucko but I nay can do so, this be as far as I can open me mouth ever since that Scurvy Bilge Rat did strike me with that Belaying Pin ! "