Ted Rall for October 11, 1999
Transcript:
The modest proposal. In the past, schools paid no attention to the vicious thugs who beat up fellow students for no reason whatsoever. (Man: This school doesn't tolerate fighting, young man- If you come out of that coma, you've got 40 detentions!) Now that geeks are packing heat, however school violence is suddenly a big problem. (Man 2: Some chess club member killed my QB and my best linebacker. A math geek killed my end. If this keeps up, my whole team will be pushing up ragweed!) Could it be that schools only worry about thugs when they're on the business end of abuse? Or is the thought of nerds with guns too much for the jockophiles to bear? (Man 1: Rall! Put down that gun and let him beat you to a mangled mass!) There's the obvious solution: But don't hold your breath. (Man: But if we send all the wimps to death cams, who will the jocks beat up?)