Ted Rall for July 10, 2003
July 07, 2003
July 12, 2003
Transcript:
American experts have been sent to Liberia to determine whether or not to invade. Early source-rock and hydrocarbon basin modeling analyses resulted in low-yield high h2s oil biomakers, indicating that the Liberian people do not desire liberation. (Man 1: Lame core sample.... I'd favor self-determination.) (Woman: I wouldn't send marines with N2 levels over 2%) However, substantial high-viscosity reserves are confirmed in nearby Nigeria and ivory coast. This implies that oppressed Liberians also desperately yearn for U.S. occupation. (Man 2: The Gulf of Guniea has 60 billion barrels of proven reserves. Basic human rights are at stake!) Ultimately, of course, the decision comes down to one man. (George Bush: What about seismics? God 3-D?) (Man 3: Page 4, but the case for freeing Liberia relies on sulfur content.
