That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for July 28, 2021

“We are renting it for the summer while our main palace is being renovated.”

“Throw in free WiFi and we’ll take it.”

Yes, there are quite a lot of windows, but they are so difficult to clean you need not worry about sunlight fading your tapestries.

The German architect tried to reproduce the Palace of Versailles, but his version was a little smaller, as he couldn’t figure out what the F*#^ you need all those rooms for.

The ultimate in ‘keeping up with the Jonses’ – a miniature mansion, for the ‘almost filthy-rich’.

In this fine view of Babelsberg Palace, / you see signs of the architect’s malice / toward Prince William, his boss / (and the lord of the schloss), / placing every ten feet a stone phallus.

The newest Disney Theme Park, breaking away from out-dated Princess stereotypes, will have as it’s centerpiece this modest castle of Prince Carol, the Sensible.

The facade of the place is benumbing/ the interior decor, becoming../ there is only one issue/ (aside from no tissue)/ the absence of indoor plumbing…it’s a feature I quite dislike/ to the outhouse is quite a hike/ it’s a pain in the butt/ what kind of a nut/ must ride to the John on a bike ?

“It isn’t Versailles, that’s true/ and Neuschwanstein is just too “too”/ No, this simple chateau/ is no Chenonceau/..but I guess for the night it will do.."

Great Moments in Phallic Architecture.

You cannot get there by car/ and to cycle is simply too far/ and we cannot afford/ to purchase Chambord/ so I guess we’ll not live on the Loire.

I guess it’s Okay for me/ but “fit for a King ?” It can’t be !/ And for Nymphenburg Schloss/ I don’t give a toss/ but I’d settle for Sans Souci.

“It’s called “Time Sharing.” It’s the future of vacationing."

best of all, the game room is equipped with its own deluxe microwave…

…and when your teenagers are grown up and moved out you can use 17 bedrooms to store all the junk accumulated while raising them.

This is where they filmed “The Woman in the Window”

“Oh good, the garage around back is attached.”

the dungeon is where I get my kink on.

“So tell me, Herr Schepker, wouldn’t this be the perfect location for your company headquarters?”

The Maine Cabin Masters outdid themselves on this one. But just wait until you see what the Barnwood Builders came up with on the next lot.

Brings a whole new meaning to being ‘grounded’.

Lebron’s California house is for sale.

It’s Downton Abbey?

The moat is on backorder.

A dungeon?! Kids sure are spoiled these days! My parents threw me into a muddy pit in the backyard!

A dungeon – that is what I call my man cave. Sounds much better when I tell the wife, “OK, I will spend some time in the dungeon.”

“You go to the front door and I’ll go around back. And remember, whoever answers the door, ask them “HAVE YOU HEARD THE GOOD NEWS?”

“What do we do if they say “Yes, we have”?

“I don’t know. Nobody’s ever said that to us before…”

“Do the cannons come with it?”

“Yes. The neighbors are somewhat…ummm…competitive.”

As any realtor will tell you, moat appeal is very important.

okay… had to look up garderobes; i love learning new stuff… can’t wait to slip it into a conversation.

That 1/2 garderobe, I hope it’s the more important half.

The palace of Prince Wilhelm at Babelsberg: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Schloss_Babelsberg-DE168.JPG 

has info and links that point to more info about this roughly B4 paper size painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image at 

https://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2021/07/masterpiece-2758.html 

I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. What’s somewhat unique about him is that he kept his verdute small so that they could be transferred to porcelain plates, vases, etc. First work by this artist used here.

Also, no worries about sea level rise; the raised overlook can function as an outdoor dining room and the roof has a helipad.

" I love the house, but my maids won’t do windows! "

Is that the white flag of surrender I see?

In Lilliput, every house is a gigantic mansion!

To dispel any semblance of gloom / there’s a fireplace in every room, / but the multiple flues / can obscure outside views / when emitting their dark choking fume. /// And at times the thick smoke gets so dense / it produces reactions intense. / When chimneys are smoking / we all begin choking! / I would move, if I had any sense.

I hate installing my own oubliettes.

houses aren’t selling now, like it’s 1856

Is this the place they raise Babel fish?

We pride ourselves in defense. They just appear as castle turrets. They are really missile launchers.

Oh, dear, we can’t afford to keep Downton. Family conference in the library, right after breakfast.