That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for October 05, 2022

Kristen picked the wrong colors when she auditioned for a part in Star Trek episode Let That Be Your Last Battlefield.

The radiation beauty treatment turned out to be a little problematic.

i knew i should have brought more flesh colored paint, i knew it, i knew it, i knew it!

She slept in the sun til she waked/

But only one side of her ached/

Some things can’t be faked -/

(She was only half- naked)/

But she also was plainly “half-baked” !

She’d been sunning herself in her yard/

In the hope of losing some lard/

She was forced to announce/

That she’d not lost an ounce/

But one buttock was beautifully charred.

Why yes! I am half American-Indian, half Asian-Indian. How could you tell?

The word on Carla was that she was two-faced to the max!

Blush/2.0

who knew her allergic reaction to watermelon would result in a trip to the ER.

Karl:“See ma, this is why I need the 64 crayon box”.

Add yet another villainess to Dick Tracy’s Rogues Gallery:

Crooked cosmetician “Two-Tone” Tootsie.

The oddest request the festival face-painters ever had.

as far as he could recall, he had never in his many years as a plastic surgeon previously received a request for the “modigliani look”…

That look when you’re hoping no one thinks you are the cause of that strange odor

/// She won fame for her wholesome allure,

but acclaim made her feel insecure.

Half embarrassed, half proud

of the welcoming crowd

to meet Mary (“Oh, Rob!”) Tyler Moore.

What could cause this young nun to cavort

with a two-tone face, and to exhort

other staid theologians

to cheer USC Trojans?

She’s a fan of collegiate sport.

/// She’s been lit from both sides, we can tell,

by a Klieg with a different gel.

Colors of molten lava,

used by Mario Bava

in his movie to symbolize Hėll.

“You know, part of me is kind of embarrassed.”

Or unplug the one on her right.

Carla cursed her black and white television when she figured out she had the colors all wrong for the Braveheart party

Apparently Batman villain Two-Face went through a lot of concept work.

Soon after this painting, Karl Wiener decided that his failure to impress Austrian art critics had everything to do with his laughable name and not his lack of talent so he changed it to Adolph Hitler.

Wilma rode shotgun on the road trip back east.

Looks like Matisse has struck.

The girl from Ipanema’s counterpart – the girl from Copacabana.

Pretty lady even if she is a little off color!

Female Portrait: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Wien Museum" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, Ecosia, and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the first Weibliches text string, and click its link for info (best viewed using Google Chrome, which can automatically translate most webpages as necessary) and links that point to more info about this gouache on paperboard, roughly US Government letter size painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3006 (October 5, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to basic info about this artist (all I could find online). First work by this artist used here.

Tanya took the whole autumn pumpkin spice thing a bit too far.

Schizophrenia seldom manifests visibly- but when it does…hoo boy !

Oh yeah? Well … you should see what the beta tester looks like!

/// Her ex-boyfriend would tell friends with snark

he preferred making love in the dark.

The crude joker was done

when she learned he’d made fun

of her lifelong port wine stain birthmark.

In fourteen and ninety two/

Columbus left Spain for the New/

World of which he was sure/

If he could but endure /

The chance he’d be hanged by his crew..