Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for September 26, 2013

Transcript:

Enjoy this Classic Tom the Dancing Bug Every Thursday Panels from the annals of the Tom the Dancing Bug archive Check back every Friday for a fresh, brand new Tom the Dancing Bug! Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling God's Reelection Campaign "My 12 billion-year term is almost up -- and I need YOUR support for 12 billion more!!" GOD for SUPREME DEITY "Hey, His NAME is GOD!" The campaign was not going well. God's previous inaccessibility made his attempts at positive publicity seem disingenuous. God: ...and I'm sure this new shopping mall will bring prosperity to the whole tri-county area... Voice: Hey, God! I prayed for a job eight months ago, and I'm still out of work! Emboldened by the possibility of an ouster, people began expressing their dissatisfaction. FACES IN THE CROWD. Dirk Valle Construction Worker "Famine, disease, misery, disasters....I say throw the bum out." Sally Reemer Legal Secretary God's opponent, Norm Drucker, a successful entrepreneur, ran on a business approach. Norm: I run a pretty darn good chain of car dealerships. I think I can run the universe even better! Drucker's litany of proposals were real crowd pleasers. NORM DRUCKER for SUPREME DEITY Just a few more new ideas from Norm Drucker: #134 A new beverage-holding appendage on all humans #135 Waffle Trees #136 No gravity one hour each day #137 Talking llamas God tried to counter by revoking some of his less popular tenets, but the polls wouldn't budge. God: Okay. You can use my name in vain. And I'm looking into the adultery thing... In a final debate, God's divine wisdom was no match for Drucker's sensational promises. God: He doesn't know anything about ruling the cosmos! Evil is NECESSARY in order for good to EXIST!! Norm: Evil! Gone! First 100 days! But in the end, God showed why an omnipotent incumbent is so tough to beat. New York Bugle GOD WINS IN 'MIRACULOUS' UPSET! Drucker Suddenly Afflicted With Boils