Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for November 15, 2014

So his Alla-KAZAM does not work?

I guess you have to diagnose something before you can officially have it.

Somebody has to supply the money that the drug companies send to their politicians.

“At least in their country they have universal healthcare, unlike one country we know.”.

By this, you’re assuming the wizard doesn’t pay out of pocket?.The only way to really make health care affordable is to make it cheaper, not by shifting the cost to others. This requires more automation because people are so expensive..Well, there IS another way: having low skilled workers provide health care. Imagine a government program which would take long term unemployed, give them several weeks of medical training and licensing them to treat the ailing. Most complaints are for a few problems, anyway so maybe 19 out of 20 would actually get the help they needed..Using the latter in conjunction with the former, you could supply the newly employed health care providers with machinery to scan and check blood chemistry in conjunction with internet access to diagnostics programs and give the best quality service in the world.

what about the kittys? kittys need health care too

Growing old is so wonderful!

I thought that was an apple…

People don’t want compassion when they’re ill, they want help.Compassion is for when you can’t help.

Kind of a “grim” thought, isn’t it?

Not true! They would find me hanging in the ’endo’s’ office on Wedesday.