Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for November 28, 2023

what’s his crime? not putting Christmas decorations earlier?

I’d rather jump off a cliff than hear the same Christmas songs every time. I feel you.

What a cruel and unusual punishment …

Hit the road, Jack, don’t you come back no more, no more

During the seige of the Alamo, Santa Anna had El degüello, a bugle call signifying no quarter, played day and night to torture the defenders.

The lawyers from the World Court would like a word with you your fineness.

The Fink has got him in a funk.

Carey has a lot to answer for……..

It’s that time of year, unfortunately

My favorite radio station started 24/7 Christmas songs at noon the day before Thanksgiving. They can’t even wait until the turkey is cold. I won’t be turning it on again until Dec. 26.

Then, the king put on the Chipmunks Christmas album…

Grandma got run over by a…BANG! THUD! Good riddance.

If they were playing “Santa Baby,” I would be singing like a bird.

My least liked Christmas song is “Santa Claus is coming to town”, by Bruce Springsteen. Anyone else have one they don’t care for?

The worst torture and it stays in your head!!!!!!!

It’s not that the song is BAD (It’s actually pretty good!), it’s that it’s sung too often and in too many places! When it first came out it, it was awesome there was a good Christmas song that didn’t rely on the old tropes. If we had more of that, this wouldn’t be an issue. But the horse is not only dead and beaten, it was dug out of it’s grave, the bones are half-gone, and it’s STILL getting the BLEEP knocked out of it!

God how I hate that song!!!

That would be torture.

The Fink has some powers that he never dreamed of.

It would have been "Grandma got run over by a reindeer’ but the courts ruled that would be cruel and unusual punishment.

It looks like Mariah might be getting coal instead of a mink stole in her stocking for Christmas with a pending lawsuit on that song.

See? I told you this variant would come sooner or later

The Fink can’t Carey a tune.

Especially that last high note of the song!

check out the Foghat version

That reminds me of an old crime series from Hamburg (“Adelheid und ihre Mörder”). The Inspector used to fixate the culprits to the radiator in his office and let them listen to Adriano Celentano’s “Azzurro” for hours until they were ready to spill. Sometimes he forgot about the poor guys ;-)

Like the sound of fingernails on chalkboard.

That’d be enough to make anyone give in and talk…

I never dreamed the Fink was that evil.

isnt that against The Geneva Convention?

Could be worse. Any rap or hip hop.

Cruel and unusual.