Arlo and Janis by Jimmy Johnson for March 01, 2024

More manipulation. Who knew Mary Lou was such a shrew!

Leave the guy alone. What is it with kids and others who think they know best how to live someone else’s life? Karma will get her when she gets old.

Scheming little wench.

I’m confused. There’s a condo (apartment in British English), and there is a guest house. The condo is in the city,and the guest house at the beach? Or the other way around. Pop used to live in the city? Or at the beach? Can’t follow anymore…

Fear of losing someone can cloud your decisions. Don’t make him resent you Mary Lou.

Let Gus do whatever he wants, the problem will sort itself…

Too much hate for Mary Lou. Older adult may think they can take care of themselves, but it’s not always true. I’m living it right now with my dad. He’s 86, some age-related dementia, and if not for a fall that left him lying on his bathroom floor for 3 days, with a subsequent hospital stay, he’d still be living alone in his condo. We convinced him to move to an independent living facility where he would get three meals a day and no longer live off of cereal for days on end. He just fell again the other night, but staff found him in the morning. He still thinks he can drive although he’s forgotten how his thermostat works. Mary Lou sees what Gus won’t admit.

What part of Pop’s life do they have authority to ‘consider’? I know, they love him, but that extends to cautions and statements of “I love you.” Not imagining they control his life decisions.

They have no control without a Power of Attorney.

I wish they would change the storyline, it’s getting old, no pun intended.

soo… make him as miserable as possible by doing what to ruin his stay? :\

Wow. So many downright hateful comments about Mary Lou. Perhaps she should just say, “Do whatever, Dad,” then refuse to up the phone when the next emergency happens. He is not held prisoner in isolation, nor mistreated. If he moves, obviously Mary Lou has to accept that, but she doesn’t have to celebrate him putting himself in the situation that nearly killed him. He is lucky, lucky to have a daughter who even cares.

Geez, put on some PJ’s, will ya?

Sell the condo and move into an assisted living. There he will be looked after and have friends, but be on his own. Mom was in one and loved having people her age to talk to. They also went places. She had her own small apartment

When did adult children start acting as if their parents were children? It does seem to be a growing trend.

Tsk, tsk, don’t you remember the old saying? “Life’s a Beach and then you die…” ☺

It all boils down to that…………….

I’m with Gus. I’m old. If I could afford a beach house where it’s quiet, I’d love to just go there & live happily ever after. As long as there’s a grocer within a mile.

Sure. That will work. No one is happy at a beach.

It’s sounds to me like she believes that Gus “being happy” involves activities that are as Alexander Woollcott said, “illegal, immoral, or fattening” and likely to shorten his life.

These two seem a little manipulative to me. As an older person, I have to say I’d be a little annoyed.

They need to stop trying to manipulate everyone.

Make him unhappy for his own happiness.

Gus’s health is a real concern, but badgering or manipulating to “make him” stay healthy is totally out of line. They should have a real conversation about how he will keep himself healthy this time and what kind of support he would value. It’s his life, after all. Yes, they have to deal with the consequences of his ill health, but it’s not like he has dementia.

For a number of years I was a chaplain at a “full range of care” facility. We saw that people who elected to enter the place did better than most of those whose family pushed for them to be there. I hope the kids and Gus take a tour of such a facility, so they see the options, not just leave things to their imagination. Also, at age 78 my wife and I moved into a total care “village,” where we’ve now lived for over 2 years in an “independent living” house, and have the assurance that as we get frail, we will be able to move into assisted living, skilled nursing care and then even hospice. I’ve joked that that’s all good, but after I die, I’m on my own—no cemetery plot or columbarium for ashes included. But even there, we are free to make our plans. Sticking your head in the sand doesn’t help anyone.

This is all much too hush-hush. This is a group matter and should be the subject of an open discussion. Otherwise, at least one party will be blindsided by something the two other parties were aware of but didn’t see a reason to mention it.

She ought to leave the old man alone. If not, she ought to go see a shrink.

Men hunt and fish while women take care of family business. Thank God for women.

Anyone else hoping this arc ends soon?

Ah yes, control the parent(s), that always works-then you read the will…gotcha.

Husband over the decades talked about one day retiring to Lancaster, PA. The later on it became Williamsburg, VA. Now he goes back and forth.

I stand and look around the house and what we would HAVE to take with us (treasured collections we could not live without – my teddy bears, his James Bond stuff, etc) and house was decorated as we like in 18th century revival (though the addition of his biggish TV to the living room he had carefully decorated to 18th century during Covid sort of ruins the look of the room and despite his explanation to me that same when in stores is so bright due to a special setting for stores which we would shut off when it was home – no such thing exists and I have to wear anti-glare glasses which only sort of help for Friday night “Midnight movie on TV” and Saturday night “Date Night movie on TV”. Book collections. Power tools in garage and basement. Craft studio items – including 2 smallish looms, several sewing machines, FABRIC, etc. And BOOKS – Books everywhere – bookcases and bookcases of them and most are non-fiction. He did finally get rid of a bookcase worth of books which were in the basement related to his profession as he no longer works at same. But we have 18th century history/reenacting books, 19th century ditto, my Louisa May Alcott books (some are antiques), My needlework books, cookbooks… We have (by a quick count in my count) 10 plus 6ft tall bookcases plus books on half size bookcases, books in stacks, books in his woodshop (aka garage), books in his other workshops in the basement and so on. My teddy bear collection takes up a room by itself (and some dolls) – and the teddy bear related books are there.

There is no way that we could move and be happy with what we can keep and take with us.